Divine Reset: How to Refresh with God in 2025

January 5, 2025January 5, 2025Leave a comment

Well, folks. A new year is upon us. Time to take inventory of the good, the bad, the ugly, and yes, the awesome!

For some, 2024 was a rough year, easily worth leaving behind; for others, the year wasn’t so bad, perhaps the kind one can build from. Regardless of your 2024 narrative, there’s a way to find footing and advance with confidence into the new year. While the steps are unique depending on the person and situation, there exists a holy outline from which we can corporately adhere; hence, why I’m sparing no time (and expense) in publishing this post. 😊

As always, let’s plug our nose and dive in…

1. Invite God Into Your Midst

If you’re a regular on here, you know Lys and I love this topic.

Grow ⬆️ Up: A Call for Us in 2024 (Part 1)

Full Runnings: A Guide on Referencing God (Part 1)

Before we can start working on our inner man, we must first connect with God, humbly and often. While ‘come as you are’, a popular phrase in Christian circles, isn’t expressed verbatim in Scripture, the Word is clear how God desires us to invite Him into our brokenness. Interestingly, we find support in both testaments. In Isaiah 1:18, God invites people to come to Him, even if their sins are like scarlet. In Joel 2:32, the prophet declares deliverance to those who call upon the name of the Lord despite the chaos in context. In both instances, God not only offers His availability to engage, but His intention to heal, purify, and restore.

Regarding application, we must understand God accepts us ahead of our clean up, not just after. While some gospels preach doctrines of “progress downpayment” in which God requires a degree of level-reaching, when we consider how Jesus prepared and troubleshot during His ministry, we find His love, compassion, and grace was in the moment as well as beyond it. During these times, Jesus always brought salvation to the immediate while encouraging whom He saved to leave their baggage behind and follow Him¹ . To me, this is an inspiring facet of Christ’s presence with people and should be embraced as a model to the believer.

For starters, Jesus never forced theology and mission upon His audience but rather received them with a tender heart, a firm charge, and in some cases, hands on ministry. Secondly, Jesus anticipated forgiveness and reconciliation wherever He went. Even if it didn’t happen right away, His desire to plant hope in people was crucial to His love being felt along with His call to release the past. Accordingly, if anyone wants to experience radical change, we must see Jesus as foundation and cornerstone to whatever endeavor we launch or sustain in 2025.

As for those who hesitate to invite God in regularly on account of prior acceptance, I employ you to daily act in accordance with the grace you’ve received and not undermine it for personal gain. As Hebrews 10:22 confirms, only God can give His children the full assurance of faith while cleansing them from sin. Though the point of salvation is an eternally significant mile-marker, there is no sense in forsaking conviction and tolerating strongholds if what we allegedly confess peaks to the contrary.

Bottom line: If we desire to see God’s ways be made straight in our lives, if we want to encounter the totality of His peace and joy² without reducing them as ends from a mean, then invite God into your midst, the unknowns, and the fragility of your circumstances, and watch what He will do.

2. Request a Divine Reset

Once you’ve invited God into your brokenness, submitting applications in prayer is generally the next step. But in the case of a new year, whether you’re looking to jumpstart faith or grow deeper with God, dare to request a divine reset. In Isaiah 43:18-21, God gives an illustration of a divine reset by telling the Israelites He will do something new like they’ve never seen before. After imparting them not to remember the former things in v. 18, we find the new thing one verse later:

“I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert.”

Using a relatable word picture, God previews His power made manifest; however, it’s important to note the sequence here doesn’t end with a supernatural display but a subsequent call for the people He makes a way for to declare His praise (v. 21). Thus, when we request a reset, we must see the endgame as more than our breakthrough but also an avenue to discover God make known His goodness tot he world. Remember God is not some wishful genie on standby but the author of our redemption and source of our sustenance. Though resets and renewals come in all shapes and sizes, the key is to understand the reason is Him shining at the center of whatever growth we aspire to see.

Bottom line: When requesting a divine reset, don’t just ask for it to cover past mistakes, but expect it in the spirit of obliterating obstacles standing between you and God. Sometimes, the reason we find ourselves stuck is because we aren’t in the practice of speaking truth to every lie and fear we face. Eventually, we find ourselves in the mire wondering how we got stymied in the first place. Though setbacks are inevitable, when we cry out for rescue or redemption, may we see with fresh eyes the sovereignty of God straightening His ways while also removing the clutter hindering our awareness of His presence and power. Again, God has a plan and purpose for you. Even if 2025 is an extension of a desert or wilderness season, He is more than enough to meet you as an oasis any time, any place.

Selah.

Stay tuned next time when I’ll share my final two points on how we can refresh with God heading in the new year. Until then, stay safe, classy, and blessed in all you say and do.

Footnotes

Laying down our weights in exchange for our cross (Matthew 16:24-26) is how we position God’s paths to be made straight in our lives. This can’t be strived for in our own strength.
Diving in deeper, Paul is clear in his letters how God governs us through peace and motivates us through joy. When we see what God wants to do, when we catch His purposes (and focus less on what our purpose is), the Lord promises there will be joy in the process. This doesn’t negate the challenges we walk through but ensures there will be glory amidst the endurance and perseverance.

Photo creds: Unsplash, iStock

Year in Review: A Look Back at 2024

December 27, 2024January 3, 2025Leave a comment

Remember Charles Dicken’s epic opening in “A Tale of Two Cities”?

“It was the best of times, it was the worst of times…it was the epoch of belief, it was the epoch of incredulity…it was the season of Light, it was the season of Darkness, it was the spring of hope, it was the winter of despair.”

Back in the day, I used to read these clauses as ‘either/or’, as if you could only be on one side of the ledger.

But lately, my interpretation has evolved to something more in line with Shannon Alder:

“Sometimes the best and worst times of your life can coincide. It is a talent of the soul to discover the joy in pain—-thinking of moments you long for, and knowing you’ll never have them again. The beautiful ghosts of our past haunt us, and yet we still can’t decide if the pain they caused us outweighs the tender moments when they touched our soul. This is the irony of love.”

Indeed, 2024, like any year, has featured its share of ups and downs, the rollercoaster largely attributable to family dynamics and the neurodivergences we daily troubleshoot.

Yet, unlike last year, I’ve rediscovered my smile again, and as a vintage Mastercard commercial will tell you, you can’t put a price tag on that. As my prior Year in Review update attests, 2023 was one of the worst years I experienced, not only for me but for Lys and the rest of the family. Stuck in post-Juju grief, financial hardship, desperate for new work, there were many discouraging narratives outside our control. But twelve months later, I’m happy to say the landscape has changed dramatically, and with it, our perspective and outlook.

Of note, my first year at Mercy Multiplied was a major highlight. Heading into the year, I didn’t know how I would adjust to an Accounting Manager role after a four-year stint as a Client Support Manager; however, as I would soon find, the environment, training, and teaming would provide plenty of stability and balance. While much more could be said, the skinny is the faithfulness of God. By His grace, He has not only fused the best from past pitstops, but has also networked a foundation from which I’ve been able to apply lessons learned from those eras. Even in a high transition/turnover year, I’ve felt more anchored during the 9-5 as new skills, connections, and opportunities have accrued. Consequently, I head into 2025 with more occupational momentum and excitement than anticipated.

On the home front, the most notable occurrence took place on February 13, 2024, on which my son, Milo, survived a brutal attack from our neighbor’s dog. Emotionally and physically shredded, Milo recovered quickly during the spring, though we continue to devote many hours to his healing. In light of Milo’s autistic diagnosis following the incident, his progress has included weekly occupational, feeding, and trauma therapies. As we navigate legal hurdles, we’ve also been investing in life wellness activities for Caeden and Everly as they advance in their own grief journeys. Needless to say, much of life this year has centered on restoration, though we rejoice in God’s sovereignty and knowing Satan’s intent to destroy our family has backfired tremendously.

In terms of memorable moments, our family trip to California in mid-May proved to be a horizon-broadening experience for the kids. Honoring the late Reverend Dennis Shuey in our travels, we soaked up the sun from Monterey to San Jose during our 8-day voyage. While the inspiration behind the trek was dampening, our time in the Golden State allowed for some much-needed family bonding and quality time.

Weather-wise, there were two instances worthy of mention:

Winter Storm Heather (January 14-15, 2024) – This event not only shattered expectations but was verified as a top three snow event dating back to the 1995-96 winter. Stuck at home for over a week, the eight consecutive 1+” snow depth streak at BNA was the longest since January 1978. The refreezing of melted snow kept sledding conditions ideal during much of this time. I’ll let the time lapses and highlights below take it from there…

2. Columbia Tornado (May 8, 2024) – While snow has a special place in my heart, the top meteorological moment of the year was my Columbia storm chase on May 8, during which I confronted the mesocyclone that produced a killer tornado just a mile from my location. Tracking on a whim, the tornado was the second I successfully intercepted. Unfortunately, 67 year-old, Cheryl Lovett lost her life when the tornado struck her home on Bear Creek Pike.

Spiritually speaking, 2024 came full circle for Caeden, who expressed a desire to be baptized in January before taking the plunge on September 29, 2024.

Church-wise, we continue to attend and serve at The Gate Church. As Communication Directors, Lys and I are eager to see what the new year brings with new pastoral care initiatives in motion.

Regarding our While We’re Waiting small group, Lys and I continue to ‘grassroot’ a local cohort. Since June, we’ve partnered with two on-air ministries, Christian Missionary Radio and 104.9 The Gospel, in sharing our heart behind the community. With a rejuvenated passion to reach bereaved parents, we hope to facilitate greater healing within our group so onsite and virtual ministry can coincide. No question, planting this tribe of God’s presence has been a breath of fresh air.

In other news, Fry Freelance has expanded its wings again with new podcasting projects and two new books under construction. Even as AI invades more digital and entrepreneurial space, we hope to keep up with the times while staying true to our brand. Don’t be surprised if the His Girl Fryday website and name go under construction in 2025 after a 10,000 hit-year. As these endeavors fill in the lines, Lys and I are also hoping to mature our homeschooling rhythm in tandem with the wonderful people and curriculum of Arrows Academy. Since our January enrollment, they have provided a safe learning space for Caeden, Everly, and Milo. The three even got to be in their first school production when they were cast as spiders in Charlotte’s Web!

As for smiley Aili, well, she continues to amaze us with her growth and cunning. The epitome of rainbow baby, she’s been a mellow glue binding the family since her arrival last July. We celebrate not only her health and development but also her upbeat and centralizing energy.

Overall, while there were setbacks in 2024, they pale compared to the rebounding narratives we find ourselves in. After the third worst year of the century last year, 2024 wraps up as the best since 2016 and one of the best start-to-finish years since graduating college. Whether next year features another two steps forward, we know having been through the wringer in recent years how God works out all things for His glory and good. So it is with our prayers for you and your family that you endure and press forward in His name with hope and expectancy fully attached.

To you and yours, we wish you a very Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year!

~ Cameron, Lyssah, Caeden, Every, Milo, Jubilee, and Aili Fry

Cover photo creds: NWS-Nashville

Scriptural Introspection: Why Self-Awareness and Self-Consciousness are Not Synonymous

August 23, 2024September 3, 2024Leave a comment

The story of 2024 continues to write itself as one with Rivendell themes. As time progresses, so does the rest and recovery. Granted, working in a place where refuge is naturally extended helps; however, this doesn’t undermine the revelations that have accrued as a result.

Consider the most recent illumination rocking my boat of late…

Historically speaking, I’ve been way too self-conscious and self-critical, enough to the point I sometimes project it onto others and assume unfair judgment as the recipient. It’s twisted and messed up, as Carrie Underwood would say, enough to compel me to discern the missteps. What causes the heart to stray from alignment, especially during challenging circumstances?

While the reasons vary, we must be careful not to overanalyze our situations given the tendency is a byproduct of unanchored introspection. At work, at home, wherever we go, taking inventory, from the physical to the spiritual variety, makes sense and carries value. In fact, one would be unwise to limit or avoid the practice altogether. But when we talk about faith, trust, and surrender, these virtues need room to breathe in our life, which can only happen when we’re at rest inviting God into our midst, when we’re abiding with Christ as we seek first the Kingdom.

As to how this applies within the dichotomy of self-awareness versus self-consciousness? In the spirit of a healthy introduction, I’ll keep it simple:

Self-awareness in its purest form is an honest evaluation of oneself, from innate wirings to strengths and weaknesses whereas self-consciousness is an assessment insecurity tied to preservation.
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Many people think these concepts are synonymous, but this couldn’t be further from the truth.With self-awareness, you are ‘woke’ to your original design, equipped in knowing your ‘why’ but also where internal improvements can be made. Scripturally applied, self-awareness can advance us to the Father as we are in the moment, desperate for appointed pathways to be made straight. Conversely, with self-consciousness, you are stuck in striving mode, bogged down by one or more of the following:

1) An entitlement that seeks situation justification
2) Vindication against the adversities limiting your influence and/or capping your maturity
3) Self-doubt that God can accomplish His purposes in the face of whatever mountain you’re scaling

Too much self-consciousness and you’ll ultimately misappropriate the way you’re to overcome (or climb the terrain assuming #3 relates). As Oswald Chambers warns us in ‘My Utmost for His Highest’, the more self-conscious we are, the more at risk we are for self-pity, a snare of the enemy chaining us to negative thought and behavior patterns. If you’ve ever wondered why life seems to be such an unfair game of Minesweeper, chances are you’re knocking on the door of this scheme.

Thankfully, where there’s a will, there’s a way. No matter where we are, on the clock or off the record, we can approach God in the spirit of childlikeness and resist the temptation to dispute or dissect our misfortunes. As I’m gradually learning, self-consciousness is a bane to discovering Christ since it recenters our aim, focuses on the distractions we complain exist, and misaligns our steps. If we’re to recalibrate, dare to ‘aware’ yourself to God, not from Him. Own the places where you’ve made life a sad song based on what isn’t working and receive by faith the happy song concerning what has and what will work with time, devotion, and unwavering dedication.

Remember God delights in our repetition, so don’t be afraid to pray and declare the same truths over and over again.

As long as we have breath…

Until next time, stay safe and sanctified…

You got this!!!

Supporting verses: Matthew 11:28-30; Psalm 139:23-24, 2 Corinthians 13:5, Romans 12:2

Graphic creds: Pngtree

Office Angst: 7 Signs of a Toxic Workplace (Part 2)

March 22, 2024March 23, 2024Leave a comment

In my last post,  I examined the first four of seven toxic workplace traits and provided Biblical support to each section. For today, I want to conclude this series with my final three attributes along with a recap pod summarizing my points. As a reminder, while we’re exploring cultural and environmental red flags, we’re not hiding from leadership issues as the topics ultimately cannot be detached. 

Without further ado, let’s tie a bow on this…

5) Inconsistent Leadership

 When we talk about toxic work cultures, there are several dismissive characteristics we could cite from narcissism to manipulation to arrogance; however, there’s one, in particular, encompassing a multitude and that is incongruence (I.e. when a person’s actions contrast their words).

Ask any leader or tenured employee with authority and they’ll admit responsibility and accountability are essential to positive team performance and morale. Yet, where there are inconsistencies between expectation and execution, there is room for misinterpretation, miscommunication, tolerance, even negative emulation down the line.   

The good news here is the fix doesn’t have to be complicated: If you’re a team lead, supervisor, or director, walk the talk.

For example, if you say you’re not a micromanager, don’t micromanage, even if your intent is to the contrary. Rather, assess your intent to probe past normality and be willing to receive feedback if the actions involved communicate distrust or produce uncomfortable vibes. Remember seeking clarity is one thing but second-guessing motives without compassion, grace, and understanding is another. 

If you struggle to model any of these qualities, dare to explore any area where intention and action aren’t aligned. Naturally, no one should want to be inconsistent in their work; hence, why leaders especially should understand consistency isn’t limited to the fruit of one’s hands but also the words of their mouth and the reflections of their heart. 

Supporting Bible verses: Psalm 19, Matthew 7:3, Mathew 23:3, Luke 16:13, 1 Corinthians 15:58, Galatians 6:9, 1 John 4:20

6)  Overtolerance and Permissiveness

To be fair, this point flows from the one prior, but based on perceived abuse, this warrants a separate explanation. If you say certain actions won’t be tolerated, don’t make the principles behind them conditional. Instead of granting exceptions based on seat or situation, handle moral failures and detrimental conducts consistently regardless if the person involved in an established personality or rookie within their probationary period.

From what I’ve seen, the top-down ripple effect of steady rationale and decision making can be empowering in the long term, even if it’s messy in the short term. Whenever trust bends or breaks, abiding by proper protocol will not only enhance security but also encourage people to adhere to higher standards of integrity. 

Put another way, if you’re a leader, don’t sacrifice reproach by synonymizing forgiveness and tolerance. If an employee has an established track record of poor conduct, scale the offense, and timely oversee the appropriate actions in a way that benefits the whole of the team. When in doubt, just say ‘no’ to permissiveness and ‘yes’ to due diligence and follow-through.

Supporting Bible verses: Proverbs 21:16, Romans 6:1-2, 11-15; 2 Timothy 4:1-2, Ephesians 4:2, 1 Peter 3:8-11

7)  Lack of awareness and accountability 

No workplace is perfect, and employees, leaders and teams may display negative traits from time to time. However, if that behavior is pervasive, leadership must consider how the culture they’ve cultivated may be impacting the trend. Unless a single employee is the root of the hostility, a leader best serves their company by investigating beyond the conflict into its source region.

Often, if an employee starts deregulating, there’s a corporate tie-in, be it a lack of recognition/development, unclear communications, and/or insecurity. Yet, even if these currents aren’t underlying, there could be larger problems involving personal, domestic, and/or health issues, which leads me to a key point:

When a work boundary is breached, don’t automatically assume ill-intent but gauge the transparency of your corporate principles and reassess them before the repercussions.
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Handled the right way, a potentially volatile situation can de-escalate into a refreshing reset when humility meets resolution. Conversely, if a leadership committee lacks awareness and accountability, the employee will almost always follow suit.

For instance, you may have a teammate or subordinate who acts ignorantly at times. Yet perhaps he/she feels ignored, like a number within a company that hoards autonomy and withholds clarity. In these cases, don’t deal with the contention topically but with meekness that anticipates understanding.

‘Cause truth is: If leaders and teams don’t take inventory of their internal processes and how they affect personnel, discouragement, even burn-out will inevitably result. Why not rightfully deal and scale tension internally before your clients and supporters smell smoke?

Supporting Bible verses: Proverbs 11:14, Proverbs 27:17, Ephesians 4:15, James 5:16, Hebrews 10:24-25, 1 Thessalonians 5:11

As always, selah, thank you for reaching and…

Cover photo creds: Wellable

Office Angst: 7 Signs of a Toxic Workplace (Part 1)

March 8, 2024August 28, 20241 Comment

Recently, I was driving to work and it occurred to me: By the end of this year, I will have reached the 15-year mark as a full-time employee in corporate America. Crazy how time flies (or Frys in my case), eh?

While I’ve benefited from tight teams in years past, I’ve also worked on some, ahem, not so tight teams educating me to the contrary. With a notable marketplace mileage marker on the horizon, I want to examine some signs of toxic leadership/work culture as well as how we can overcome within our co-worker in Christ identity (1 Corinthians 3:9).

As always, let’s dive in!

1. Teammates aren’t treated as diverse in function, co-equal in value.

While diversity, inclusivity, and equality discussions are expected initiatives in today’s marketplace, let’s be honest: How committed are most employers to consistently upholding these principles? As much as we gravitate towards hierarchy, performance-based metrics, and capitalistic tendencies, the bottom line to this point is essentially outcome divided by constancy.

In the long run, no organization can reach its potential without each member understanding and operating within their value.
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Granted, some leave it to the individual to derive their own sense of purpose which can be fair in the context of guiding from a distance. Otherwise, vocationals should know whatever systems they’re in cannot reach their ceiling if people aren’t treated as diverse in function, co-equal in value.

Think about it: If your work leadership encourages favoritism and limits opportunities to a select few, then odds are teamwide morale will decrease and internal tension will increase. Why is this? I submit the significance of this reality is due to it being one of deepest core corporate identities. From an original design perspective, we were (and are) intended to serve as one body. Applied to the marketplace, this means we steward structures that provide equal opportunity for growth to every position and take the same approach to feedback and general engagement (More on this in a future post as honestly, this is one of my favorite topics to discuss).

Note: To those in high-level positions, consider the Jethro principles and seek to execute them effectively so middle managers are accountable to develop those under their care. If you’re young and starting out, find a leader or seasoned veteran with mentorship potential and watch how they respond to feedback and instruction. Who knows? Even if the culture is weak, you may still be able to derive motivation and inspiration from those who are secure in their strengths.

Supporting Bible verses: Hebrews 10:25, 1 Corinthians 12:12-27, 1 Corinthians 3:9, Exodus 18:14-26

2. Passive-aggressive and/or manipulative leadership.

Another side-effect of toxic leadership involves the deliberate withholding of constructive criticism, encouragement, and/or gratitude. In a post-pandemic world, you may have noticed passive-aggressive supervisors falling into one of these camps, using silence or support withdrawal as primary communications tools; however, under no circumstances, should these behaviors be tolerated.

‘Cause truth is: A mature leader not only knows when and how to deliver feedback but facilitates phycological safety, trust, and confidence in challenging situations. If you’re in an environment where leaders have ambushing agendas, redelegate tasks without proper communication, or uses silence to communicate, then I have news for you:

You deserve better!
Leaders who drive wedges and/or use ego to stir division aren’t true leaders!

Of course, I’m not suggesting you abandon ship if you’re currently working under a similar authority. Conversely, I’m encouraging you to take inventory of offenses, collect your emotions, and find a time to speak with the appropriate authority (I.e. supervisor or HR Manager depending on the situation) to clear the air. As long as you integrate other voices and honor your leaders and colleagues, your intentions will be well grounded as you steward peace, advocacy, and forward motion.

Supporting Bible verses: Proverbs 11:14, Proverbs 28:2-26, Romans 16:17-18, James 3:14, Ephesians 4:14, Luke 16:8b, Matthew 5:37

3. Lack of trust, communication, and engagement.

Per point #2, if a leader lacks trust, even with a subordinate, the ideal move is to confront the issue fostering the deficit or dissonance. Generally, an employee who feels they aren’t trusted wants to discern areas of improvement; hence, why indifference, or the perception thereof, is not only deflating but often an overflow of a toxic environment.

As you may have learned in your own experiences, a lack of communication will almost always create some form of chaos, angst, or strife, but sound leaders are keen to promote the well-being of their teammates. Remember an occasional check-in or positive acknowledgement can go a long way in reinforcing a worker’s understanding of their value while also regulating their emotions. Regardless of our role, dare to diffuse discord through compassionate engagement and curiosity.

Supporting Bible verses: 1 Corinthians 15:33-44, Titus 3:10

4. No formal review process and/or pathway for development.

As an employee with public, private, and liturgical experience, I can speak candidly to this point having seen this process mapped out a variety of ways. If your employer has no formal performance evaluation process where the only criticism is given in moments of error, then you have a major red flag in your hand.

As my time has taught me, all employees deserve to know if the work they’re doing is effective and efficient. Since we’ve established feedback and communication withholding as signs of environmental toxicity, the call here is straight-forward: Develop and promote a review process where all team members top-down are accountable and have a means to build areas of strength and weakness alike. Even if the meeting frequency is quarterly or biannual, the impacts can be massive as you streamline a process to preserve morale in tandem with corporate performance.

Supporting Bible verses: James 1:19, Proverbs 15:1, Colossians 4:6

Stay tuned next time when I’ll conclude this post with my final three points including a podcast overviewing the content. For now…