3 Ways to Mature as an Effective Influencer (Part 1)

If I were to ask what the point of ministry is, what would you say?

Drawing people to Christ? Developing them as disciple-makers? Deploying them into service?

Albeit, these are all fine answers…but what if I told you we can sum up ministry in one word…


Would you agree?

Regardless, the Word is clear our ministry emerges from our influence.

Consider 2 Corinthians 5:11

Therefore, knowing the fear of the Lord, we persuade others.”

If you’re like me, you hear ‘persuade’ and immediately think ‘convince’; yet, when we dissect the Hebrew and extend it through v. 21, we find Paul is actually talking about influence.

Applying this filter, we can better understand how influence not only partners in God’s ministry of reconciliation, but matures our effectiveness as marketplace influencers.

Granted, there are many ways to broach the topic. For now, we’ll start with our usual ‘core three’ and work from there…

1. Know who you’re fearing

As mentioned, the bottom line of ministry is reconciliation achieved through influencing; however, to get there it’s important we grasp the fear of the Lord.

For while “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge” (Proverbs 1:7), it’s also a preserver of our sincerity (Colossians 3:22) and a gateway to comfort in the Holy Spirit (Acts 9:31).

Note the latter reference:

So the church throughout all Judea and Galilee and Samaria had peace and was being built up. And walking in the fear of the Lord and in the comfort of the Holy Spirit, it multiplied.”

This tells me two things:

  1. Godly fear multiplies wisdom and virtue in addition to faith.
  2. The evidence of influence is peace inspired by encouragement.

Therefore, when we talk about influence, we’re not talking as much about personal strength as we are the maturation of corporate morale and pointing people in the direction of Jesus (more on this in future posts).

Contrarily, it’s important we understand what influence isn’t.

‘Cause while the key to influence is the fear of the Lord, the enemy will use the opposite spirit, the fear of man, along with memories of past hurt to contrive a narrative where we’re seeking to overcome what’s already been overcome.

Thankfully, as Kingdom agents…ministers of reconciliation who can persuade through the fear of the Lord…we can rhythmically resist this mindset whiling combating the compromised systems of the world.

For as long as there is sin, enterprise will be governed by hierarchy1 where people are bound by control, manipulation, and intimidation. Yet, as for you, you can see people as God sees them (i.e. forgiven) and help them find purpose through daily influencing where they are.

After all, freedom begets freedom…and He craves it more than you do.

2. Know how you’re leading

As effective influencers2, it’s imperative we not only have the right mindset towards people, but our work as well.

For starters, we must view our work as an opportunity to show people who they are as opposed to a stage to prove our self-worth. In this way, we not only invest trust in God being the one to open eyes, but free ourselves to influence through our wiring and discover new strengths through how God uses their responses.

‘Cause truth is: When we allow God into our realm of influence, we trade the pressure of of accomplishing goals for a humility motivating others to reach them.

But Cam…what if I’m not a team leader or in a place of authority?

Again, to answer this question…we must ask ourselves why we’re asking it.

For instance…


If we’re talking about what we’ve been conditioned to believe…then authority is nothing more than the appointed person governing ‘over’ us; however, if we’re talking about absolute authority3, then we can see how a) God alone carries it…and b) what we often associate as ‘authority’ is, in fact, influence manifest through the seven motivational gifts (as outlined in Romans 12).

Again, the system…a real life Matrix if you will…runs by pecking order, production, and the Jerry Maguire mindset of ‘show me the money’, but…


…as Kingdom influencers, we can approach metrics and outcomes without agenda by combining nurturing with our competence4.

Thus, whether you’re a supervisor in crunch time or a subordinate in training, you can help hold your team accountable to achieve certain goals in your respective roles. Just remember no matter what you do to galvanize effort, make sure it stems from a desire for everyone to succeed given a true influencer always values people over goals and never risks reaching them at the cost of another’s well-being.

For when we value people and decompartmentalize our desire to impact them, we not only influence a place where encouragement and goodness abound, but also where confidence and favor are ultimately shared.

Stay tuned next time when I’m unveil my third and final step to maturing as an effective influencer in the marketplace.

‘Til then if you have any questions, thoughts, concerns, feel free to leave them below in the ‘comments’ section and I’ll return serve as soon as I can.

Peace for your week,

~ Cameron


  1. As well as the idea leadership is greater than serving (contrary to Romans 12 which tells us each gift is equal and carries status and dignity)
  2. All influencers lead, but not all leaders influence
  3. Difference between authority and authorities
  4. A simple formula for adding value to your team members in a way they’ll turn to you for guidance and feedback

Cover photo creds: Bigstock/Jakub Jirsak

Kingdom Agents: The Reason Why We Exist

As mentioned in last week’s podcast, His Girl Fryday exists to bridge the bivocational divide between ministry and marketplace.

Yet, while our mission is to provide tools for your influence, give value for your destiny, and find the balance between sacred and secular, our vision…the reason why we exist…is worth discussion.

For starters, we see you as significant…a Kingdom agent made to influence (whether in business, church/missions, or both) who, like us, need routine refreshers of truth and how they apply in challenging situations.

For instance…

What do you do when an authority figure chews you out…

…or when a subordinate isn’t getting the job done?

How do we cope when a friend/colleague is stuck in sin…or when organic community constantly seems out of reach?

No question, there’s a whole lot of life to troubleshoot this side of heaven; however, while your worldview, your perception of reality, matters, it’s not until we apply a Kingdom grid to it that we begin to respond in a transformative way.

Thus, when it comes to why we exist…we exist to equip…to help you react/respond on God’s terms…whether it involves overcoming past mindsets and habit patterns or troubleshooting leadership/relationship issues.

‘Cause truth is: it’s one thing to know you’re significant, but it’s another thing to know who you are (i.e. a Kingdom agent) in the face of selfish tendencies and compromised philosophy.

Paul, in part, talks about this in Romans 8 when he says, “…in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loves us.” (v. 37)

What are ‘all these things’?

Backtrack to v. 35 – “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, or sword?”

Essentially, Paul is saying nothing can shield us from God’s love. Yes, we can choose to turn our backs, but this doesn’t mean we’re out of God’s reach.

Therefore, because God is for us and has given everything necessary for goodness and godliness (2 Peter 1:3), we can take confidence in being more than a conqueror and extend it into our marketplace function1.


As for this resource…

…it’s not only our heart to see the church embrace what God is doing in the marketplace…

…but our passion, as de-compartmentalizing ambassadors on the frontlines and sidelines of whatever race you’re running, to inspire ‘walk and talk’ alignment and connection among the bivocational/marketplace body.

That is why we exist.

Stay tuned next time when I’ll dive into why we, as marketplace ministers, must see ourselves as agents of heaven on a rescue mission.

‘Til then, peace to the journey,

~ Cameron Fry


  1. Basically, building and extending this confidence answers ‘why we’re here’

Cover photo creds: Image Paper Safari

3 Ways to Level ↑ Your E-mails


We all write them…but do we really know how?

I know, I know…sounds silly to ask, especially in the Information Age business world we live in.

Still, when it comes to etiquette, how we frame professional communication within pragmatic boundaries is worth discussion.

As a governmental employee, I’ve been on both sides of the decorum fence as a sender and recipient. So trust me when I say the importance of lining up what you say and what you mean is very important.

That said, here are three practical points in delivering quality e-mail content…

1. Keep it ‘short and sweet’

As a writer, I admit: I can be wordy at times.  I remember early in my career, I would often exhaust my word count fearing I’d say too little, conceal my tact, and/or give my recipient room to read between the lines.

Yet, after years of composition, I ultimately discovered my best e-mails were the ones with simple language and basic syntax (think 4th grade level as opposed to 8th 1). Granted, variance in e-mail construction hinge on the need; however, in most professional scenarios, e-mails will either answer a question or call to action.

Thus, if you want to communicate more effectively, consider a ‘short and sweet’ approach. Not only will you capture the problem more cogently, but also increase the odds of it being solved more quickly. Not to mention you limit the risk of asking unnecessary questions.

Bottom line: Coherency and conciseness go hand in hand.

After all, if you’re going to troubleshoot, why not shoot straight?

Bonus: If you’re concerned your ‘short and sweet’ e-mail is more on the short than sweet side, consider inserting a smiley emoji after the greeting or concluding sentence (informal cases only).



2. Make humility apparent

In a day-to-day grind, it’s hard to be perfect. Clearly, as long as there’s work, there’s going to be errors…and with errors, an assortment of cleanup, manipulative maneuvers2, and mountains made from molehills.

Okay, okay…maybe those last two are a tad extreme; however, as real world correction has taught me, it’s worth noting how to handle being on the wrong side of them.

‘Cause truth is: when people throw you shade, there’s always a fade3…and that, in one word, is humility.

Now I know for many humility is nothing more than a ‘kill with kindness’ or ‘fall on the sword’ strategy; however, given true humility has no agenda, it’s safe to say these approaches are flawed since they cater to what you want to say or what you think others want you to say.

From my experience, if you want to live true humility in the marketplace, the best approach is through forthright evaluation. In other words, if there’s something to own, be sincere in owning it; if there’s something to resolve, be direct in resolving it.

Remember when rectifying conflict electronically, the emphasis should always be reconciling the issue as opposed to justifying why it exists. In doing so, not only will you validate concerns, but establish value to whom and what is necessary to move the ball down the field.

Bottom line: Wrong turns happen. Why not write4 the ship by humbling yourself and letting God’s grace exalt you?


3. Proofread your tone, not just your grammar

 It’s fair to say the e-mail equivalent of ‘think before you speak‘ is ‘proof before you send’.

Need proof? Just check out your app store…

Grammarly, PerfectIt, Ginger, AutoCrit, No Red Ink, Hemingway Editor, Phrase Express, After The Deadline, EssayDot…and we’re just scratching the surface.

Yet, while most of us associate proofreading to syntax and grammar, arguably one of the most underrated elements in e-mail content construction is checking for tone.

Yes, you may be able to master subject lines, use the right words, and succinctly capture information; however, if you don’t put yourself in your recipient’s shoes before pressing ‘send’, you risk losing the message through ambiguity and misunderstanding.

Bottom line: When proofing your e-mails, dare to read them as sender and receiver.



  1. Just because you decrease the reading level, doesn’t mean you decrease the tact
  2. i.e. ‘throw under the bus’ tactics
  3. Specifically, a fade from offense
  4. Intentional misspelling

Cover photo creds: Shutterstock

3 Ways to Sharpen Your Sword

As I journey towards my 2018 resolutions, I’ve been increasingly reminded of last year’s renditions…

  • Lose 3-5 more pounds…check.
  • Talk more with extended family…check
  • Use social media less…check
  • Engage co-workers more…check
  • Read the Bible in a year…

…well, turns out I’ll need a few more months.

But that’s not the point.

The point is as I’ve pursued these quests, the drive to fine-tune the details within them has surged1 (more on this in a future post). Still, with the one goal outstanding, I believe it’s worth discussing how we, as Spirit and Truth believers, are to mature in our sword handling.

For as Paul explains in 2 Timothy 3:16-17, the Word of God is from the Holy Spirit and since every Christian is in a spiritual battle with the evil in this world, we need to know how to handle the Word properly.

Granted, much can be said about how we train offensively and defensively; for now, let’s narrow our focus on three practical ways we can sharpen our swords in 2018…

1. Know the Word

As one who’s never housed a protective firearm, it’s difficult relating to lethal proximity. Assuming I carried one, I imagine I’d be satisfied simply owning it early on.

But imagine I purchase a gun, hide it somewhere safe…and a week later an intruder invades. How would I respond?

Would my action not be dependent on preparation (i.e. how I studied the manual, familiarized myself with the handle, etc.), innate awareness, and calculated risk (i.e. what’s the quickest, most secure way out of the situation)? In what would be most beneficial to my family?

Unfortunately, when it comes to spiritual warfare, we often approach our swords of the Spirit like hypothetical ‘me’ with a gun. We know the Spirit lives in us, we know what the Spirit is capable of…yet are easily content in feeling secure within a covering we don’t know how to defend.

As Hebrews 4:12 states: God’s Word is His living, active, double-edged sword designed to illuminate our hearts and protect them from the enemy. The fact God would provide a penetrable weapon to reach the core of our hearts while destroying those with evil intent only confirms 2 Peter 1:3 (“His divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godliness…”).

Therefore, if we want our swords to be effective offensive and defensive weapons, it’s critical we take them to the master whetstone that is Scripture.

Now I know this may sound confusing given Paul equates Word to sword whereas Hebrews associates through metaphor. Yet, if we apply John 1 to Ephesians 6 and accept the circular reference, we can better understand how a) our sword as armor is designed to be refined by sword as Scripture2 and b) the more we discover God and His ways, the better we’ll combat temptation and satanic schemes.



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2. Grow the Word

As mentioned, sharpening our swords requires the ultimate whetstone (i.e. the Word); however, if we want them to be maximally sharp, we must grow understanding in what it inspires.

Far too often, we cap our readership to God’s Word and pleasure material. We read our daily Scriptures, spend our fifteen minutes with God, only to fill our leisure with hobbies and extra-curricular pursuits. Yet, while rest certainly has its place, if we use it to shield ourselves from the divine inspiration in others…are we not lending God a partial ear?

For instance, my passion is to create content, but I know if I want to improve this skill while growing closer to God, I must invest time in revelations apart from my own. After all, if I forsake the inspired word given to a brother/sister in Christ, I not only risk limiting my understand of certain truth, but also locking God’s word in distraction rather than hiding His word for action.

Think of it this way…

…to read God’s Word is to exercise our spirit by truth; to discover God’s Word in authorized works is to exercise truth by His Spirit.

Yes, it’s true only the Scriptures are breathed out by God; however, if our aim is to be more like Christ, we must embrace how God is inspiring others through them.


3. Show the Word

Imagine if I told my wife, “I love you. I may not show it, but I want you to know it.

That’s crazy, right?

Clearly, my love for her should be tangible, the evidence of promise as opposed to some platonic aphorism.

Of course, my wife knows I love her based on what I regularly sow; however, when it comes to living the Word, we must remember our mindset should be the same.

For as great as studying the Word and its inspiration is, it’s meaningless if our actions contrast our beliefs.

James 1:22: “But be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.”

Romans 2:13: “For it is not the hearers of the law who are righteous before God, but the doers of the law who will be justified.”

‘Cause truth is: we weren’t made to just read and believe, but lead and achieve so others can discover their Lover. That’s why you and me are here.

As for our swords, we weren’t made to simply know what can be done with them; rather we were made to use them for the sake of sharpening them time and time again.

Like light at the top of the hill, our swords must reflect a life on the frontlines…a life that reflects Jesus yet also allows iron to sharpen iron. Only then can we, by the Spirit’s power, use the Word to save souls and nourish them with spiritual strength.



  1. For instance, don’t just lose 3-5 pounds; lose 3-5 net pounds with 1-2 more upper body muscle pounds factored in
  2. In shorter words, the sword is what refines it (i.e. the Word)

Cover photo creds: kevron2001 – Deviant Art

3 Things I’m [Really] Sorry For

For many, it’s the same thing every January…

                   …we forget all acquaintance, inflate our morale…

…only to tease ourselves with premature quests founded on prayer-less resolution.

But perhaps you’re like me in the sense you prefer cleanse before change…in getting real before getting right.

If so, trust me when I say these days in early January can seem just as blue as they are buoyant.

Still, while taking internal inventory may seem less ‘fun’ compared to making resolutions, when we fearlessly explore what we need to be free from, we ultimately position ourselves to embrace the ‘next’ God has for us.

Thus, in the spirit of going under the knife, here are three things I’m owning as we turn the clock to 2018…

1) Making culture the enemy

I’ve learned many lessons as a state employee from persevering when treated like a number to managing challenging subordinates, but arguably none has gripped me so intensely as knowing your enemy in the face of conflict.

Growing up, like many, I learned Ephesians 6:12: “…we don’t wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, authorities…and spiritual forces of evil”; however, while I understood this truth conceptually, I lacked awareness contextually. For instance, at work whenever I felt belittled or neglected, I used to justify resentment by redirecting my disappointment from colleague to culture. I’d think to myself, ‘As long as what I hate isn’t breathing, I’m good.’

The problem was: my offense wasn’t going anywhere. If anything, I had taken cynicism with respect to ‘person’ and extrapolated it over ‘many persons’ all the while exchanging discouragement for a false comfort I could easily hide behind.

Yet, as I’ve now learned, when it comes to not making culture the enemy, we must be willing to assign our offenses and align our defenses in the heat of battle. Far too often, we want to make sense of our surroundings; we want to feel secure about who is for us, who isn’t for us, who is pouring into us, who isn’t, etc.

However, if our filing system defaults culture to enemy while compartmentalizing those we assume aren’t for us as products of that culture…are we not recasting the same judgment we fear?

And yeah, I know it’s easy to appoint anger and bitterness onto what we think can’t be seen; however, I encourage you…

…if your idea of enemy is the deceived, not the deceiver, then not only are you misappropriating identity, but you’re removing yourself from an opportunity to love and judge righteously.

Think of it this way: if you’re struggling to see the finger-pointing, never wrong colleagues as anything but enemies, try focusing on encouraging them (Matthew 5:44, Luke 6:27-36, Ephesians 4:32) and watch as God transforms how you see them. That way you’re at least in position to shift the enemy from instigated to instigator.


2) Hiding behind proximity

As an introvert, I love my solitude…that still calm in the middle of productivity and a dwindling ‘to do’ list.

But lately I’ve been thinking: Why is privacy perceived as such a luxury when we were created for proximity (i.e. engaged connection with those around us…not just closeness in space)?

I mean…if you’re reading this, odds are you’re close1 to someone, right? From neighbors to co-workers to immediate family and friends, it’s no question proximity is both prominent and prevalent. Why is it then if we were to describe our ideal escape, it’d often involve seclusion or separation?

Is it because we think harmony and proximity are mutually exclusive…that rest can only happen in a vacuum?

If so, I submit we get back to valuing those in our midst regardless if they treat us like strangers or outcasts.

‘Cause truth is: if how we engage people is conditioned on what we can’t control, it’s going to compromise our conviction in acting on what we can.

That said, it’s worth noting the false security in minimizing proximity.

Case and point: for years at my job I used to think to myself, ‘Just because so-and-so lives two cubicles down doesn’t mean I’m entitled to be close…’ or ‘I’ve tried talking with so-and-so, but after all these years, they’ve never tried to talking to me. Might as well as be strangers.’

However, once I realized these thoughts were only de-salting my witness, I knew my approach had to change. Like my heart towards culture, I had to stop  compartmentalizing people to make sense of my surroundings. Somehow, someway…I had to open myself back up so anyone and everyone could be a potential target for love, kindness, compassion, and encouragement.2

‘Cause like many, I can love on certain people well…plugging into their life…even giving gifts (which for me, is far down the love language list), but when I consider how Jesus broached proximity, no one was outside his periphery to love or his reach to heal.

Thus, I think it’s important we all examine ourselves and explore where good intentions may be linked to our own terms. Perhaps then we can find those secret places we may be hiding behind.


3) Marginalizingmy bandwidth

Left unguarded, my mind can easily drift into personal narrative. How will what’s left untold…unfold based on the good, bad, and ugly of yesterday?

Yet, as mentioned in prior posts, it’s hard to invest external margin (i.e. loving one another) in the present when you’re overly vesting it in the past. Therefore, if we’re wanting to be more selfless in venturing our margin John 3:30 style, then clearly we must be willing to examine our perception of relationship before transferring it.

Granted, easier said than done; however, as long as we’re intentional in asking God to breathe width into our bandwidth (i.e. capacity/strength to love on purpose), who’s to say we can’t change?

And hear me: I get how tempting it can be to assume other people’s perception of you is less than what it should; however, I also know if you cement your mind in thinking people won’t believe the best, you will do the same as well. Why not then trust God to move, convict, and transform others the same way He’s moving, convicting, and transforming you?

If it helps, if you want to de-marginalize your bandwidth, go back to your narrative…but this time, consider what you learn at 35 or 45 may be what someone else learns at 25 or 55. After all, who are we to judge when truth clicks for someone else? I mean…if we truly want to be heaven on earth, then we should want to root each other on regardless if our maturity curves line up (see Matthew 7:5).

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  1. Literally and figuratively
  2. A key distinction between world and ‘like Jesus’
  3. To treat as insignificant

Cover photo creds: Newhdwallpaper