As mentioned in last weekās podcast, His Girl Fryday exists to bridge the bivocational divide between ministry and marketplace.
Yet, while our mission is to provide tools for your influence, give value for your destiny, and find the balance between sacred and secular, our visionā¦the reason why we existā¦is worth discussion.
For starters, we see you as significantā¦a Kingdom agent made to influence (whether in business, church/missions, or both) who, like us, need routine refreshers of truth andĀ how they apply in challenging situations.
For instanceā¦
What do you do when an authority figure chews you outā¦
ā¦or when a subordinate isnāt getting the job done?
How do we cope when a friend/colleague is stuck in sinā¦or when organic community constantly seems out of reach?
No question, thereās a whole lot of life to troubleshoot this side of heaven; however, while your worldview, your perception of reality, matters, itās not until we apply a Kingdom grid to it that we begin to respond in a transformative way.
Thus, when it comes to why we existā¦we exist to equipā¦to help you react/respond on Godās termsā¦whether it involves overcoming past mindsets and habit patterns or troubleshooting leadership/relationship issues.
āCause truth is: itās one thing to know youāre significant, but itās another thing to know who you are (i.e. a Kingdom agent) in the face of selfish tendencies and compromised philosophy.
Paul, in part, talks about this in Romans 8 when he says, āā¦in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loves us.ā (v. 37)
What are āall these thingsā?
Backtrack to v. 35 ā āWho shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall tribulation, distress, persecution, famine, nakedness, danger, or sword?ā
Essentially, Paul is saying nothing can shield us from Godās love. Yes, we can choose to turn our backs, but this doesnāt mean weāre out of Godās reach.
Therefore, because God is for us and has given everything necessary for goodness and godliness (2 Peter 1:3), we can take confidence in being more than a conqueror and extend it into our marketplace function1.
As for this resource…
…itās not only our heart to see the church embrace what God is doing in the marketplace…
…but our passion, as de-compartmentalizing ambassadors on the frontlines and sidelines of whatever race you’re running, to inspire ‘walk and talk’ alignment and connection among the bivocational/marketplace body.
That is why we exist.
Stay tuned next time when I’ll dive into why we, as marketplace ministers, must see ourselves as agents of heaven on a rescue mission.
‘Til then, peace to the journey,
~ Cameron Fry
Footnotes
Basically, building and extending this confidence answers āwhy weāre hereā
I know, I knowā¦sounds silly to ask, especially in the Information Age business world we live in.
Still, when it comes to etiquette, how we frame professional communication within pragmatic boundaries is worth discussion.
As a governmental employee, Iāve been on both sides of the decorum fence as a sender and recipient. So trust me when I say the importance of lining up what you say and what you mean is very important.
That said, here are three practical points in delivering quality e-mail contentā¦
1. Keep it āshort and sweetā
As a writer, I admit: I can be wordy at times.Ā I remember early in my career, I would often exhaust my word count fearing Iād say too little, conceal my tact, and/or give my recipient room to read between the lines.
Yet, after years of composition, I ultimately discovered my best e-mails were the ones with simple language and basic syntax (think 4th grade level as opposed to 8th 1). Granted, variance in e-mail construction hinge on the need; however, in most professional scenarios, e-mails will either answer a question or call to action.
Thus, if you want to communicate more effectively, consider a āshort and sweetā approach. Not only will you capture the problem more cogently, but also increase the odds of it being solved more quickly. Not to mention you limit the risk of asking unnecessary questions.
Bottom line: Coherency and conciseness go hand in hand.
After all, if youāre going to troubleshoot, why not shoot straight?
Bonus: If youāre concerned your āshort and sweetā e-mail is more on the short than sweet side, consider inserting a smiley emoji after the greeting or concluding sentence (informal cases only).
2. Make humility apparent
In a day-to-day grind, itās hard to be perfect. Clearly, as long as thereās work, thereās going to be errorsā¦and with errors, an assortment of cleanup, manipulative maneuvers2, and mountains made from molehills.
Okay, okayā¦maybe those last two are a tad extreme; however, as real world correction has taught me, itās worth noting how to handle being on the wrong side of them.
āCause truth is: when people throw you shade, thereās always a fade3…and that, in one word, is humility.
Now I know for many humility is nothing more than a ākill with kindnessā or āfall on the swordā strategy; however, given true humility has no agenda, itās safe to say these approaches are flawed since they cater to what you want to say or what you think others want you to say.
From my experience, if you want to live true humility in the marketplace, the best approach is through forthright evaluation. In other words, if thereās something to own, be sincere in owning it; if thereās something to resolve, be direct in resolving it.
Remember when rectifying conflict electronically, the emphasis should always be reconciling the issue as opposed to justifying why it exists. In doing so, not only will you validate concerns, but establish value to whom and what is necessary to move the ball down the field.
Bottom line: Wrong turns happen. Why not write4 the ship by humbling yourself and letting Godās grace exalt you?
3. Proofread your tone, not just your grammar
Ā Itās fair to say the e-mail equivalent of āthink before you speak‘ is āproof before you sendā.
Yet, while most of us associate proofreading to syntax and grammar, arguably one of the most underrated elements in e-mail content construction is checking for tone.
Yes, you may be able to master subject lines, use the right words, and succinctly capture information; however, if you donāt put yourself in your recipientās shoes before pressing āsendā, you risk losing the message through ambiguity and misunderstanding.
Bottom line: When proofing your e-mails, dare to read them as sender and receiver.
Footnotes
Just because you decrease the reading level, doesnāt mean you decrease the tact
The point is as Iāve pursued these quests, the drive to fine-tune the details within them has surged1 (more on this in a future post). Still, with the one goal outstanding, I believe itās worth discussing how we, as Spirit and Truth believers, are to mature in our sword handling.
For as Paul explains in 2 Timothy 3:16-17, the Word of God is from the Holy Spirit and since every Christian is in a spiritual battle with the evil in this world, we need to know how to handle the Word properly.
Granted, much can be said about how we train offensively and defensively; for now, letās narrow our focus on three practical ways we can sharpen our swords in 2018ā¦
1. Know the Word
As one whoās never housed a protective firearm, itās difficult relating to lethal proximity. Assuming I carried one, I imagine Iād be satisfied simply owning it early on.
But imagine I purchase a gun, hide it somewhere safeā¦and a week later an intruder invades. How would I respond?
Would my action not be dependent on preparation (i.e. how I studied the manual, familiarized myself with the handle, etc.), innate awareness, and calculated risk (i.e. whatās the quickest, most secure way out of the situation)? In what would be most beneficial to my family?
Unfortunately, when it comes to spiritual warfare, we often approach our swords of the Spirit like hypothetical āmeā with a gun. We know the Spirit lives in us, we know what the Spirit is capable ofā¦yet are easily content in feeling secure within a covering we donāt know how to defend.
As Hebrews 4:12 states: Godās Word is His living, active, double-edged sword designed to illuminate our hearts and protect them from the enemy. The fact God would provide a penetrable weapon to reach the core of our hearts while destroying those with evil intent only confirms 2 Peter 1:3 (āHis divine power has granted to us all things that pertain to life and godlinessā¦ā).
Therefore, if we want our swords to be effective offensive and defensive weapons, itās critical we take them to the master whetstone that is Scripture.
Now I know this may sound confusing given Paul equates Word to sword whereas Hebrews associates through metaphor. Yet, if we apply John 1 to Ephesians 6 and accept the circular reference, we can better understand how a) our sword as armor is designed to be refined by sword as Scripture2 and b) the more we discover God and His ways, the better weāll combat temptation and satanic schemes.
2. Grow the Word
As mentioned, sharpening ourĀ swords requires the ultimateĀ whetstone (i.e. the Word); however, if we want them to be maximally sharp, we must grow understanding in what it inspires.
Far too often, we cap our readership to God’s Word and pleasure material. We read our daily Scriptures, spend our fifteen minutes with God, only to fill our leisureĀ with hobbies andĀ extra-curricular pursuits. Yet, while rest certainly has its place, if we use it to shield ourselves from the divine inspiration in others…are we not lending God a partial ear?
For instance, my passion is to create content, but I know if I want to improve this skill whileĀ growingĀ closer to God, I must invest time in revelations apart from myĀ own. After all, if I forsake the inspired word given to a brother/sister in Christ, I not only risk limiting my understand of certain truth, but also locking God’s word in distraction rather than hiding His word forĀ action.
Think of it this way…
…to read God’s Word is to exercise our spirit byĀ truth;Ā to discover God’s Word in authorized worksĀ is to exercise truth by HisĀ Spirit.
Yes, itās true only the Scriptures are breathed out by God; however, if our aim is to be more like Christ, we mustĀ embraceĀ how God is inspiring others through them.
3. Show the Word
Imagine if I told my wife, āI love you. I may not show it, but I want you to know it.ā
Thatās crazy, right?
Clearly, my love for her should be tangible, the evidence of promise as opposed to some platonic aphorism.
Of course, my wife knows I love her based on what I regularly sow; however, when it comes to living the Word, we must remember our mindset should be the same.
For as great as studying the Word and its inspiration is, itās meaningless if our actions contrast our beliefs.
James 1:22: āBut be doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving yourselves.ā
Romans 2:13: āFor it is not the hearers of the law who are righteous before God, but the doers of the law who will be justified.ā
āCause truth is: we werenāt made to just read and believe, but lead and achieve so others can discover their Lover. Thatās why you and me are here.
As for our swords, we werenāt made to simply know what can be done with them; rather we were made to use them for the sake of sharpening them time and time again.
Like light at the top of the hill, our swords must reflect a life on the frontlinesā¦a life that reflects Jesus yet also allows iron to sharpen iron. Only then can we, by the Spiritās power, use the Word to save souls and nourish them with spiritual strength.
Footnotes
For instance, donāt just lose 3-5 pounds; lose 3-5 net pounds with 1-2 more upper body muscle pounds factored in
In shorter words, the sword is what refines it (i.e. the Word)
ā¦only to tease ourselves with premature quests founded on prayer-less resolution.
But perhaps youāre like me in the sense you prefer cleanse before change…in getting real before getting right.
If so, trust me when I say these days in early January can seem just as blue as they are buoyant.
Still, while taking internal inventory may seem less āfunā compared to making resolutions, when we fearlessly explore what we need to be free from, we ultimately position ourselves to embrace the ānextā God has for us.
Thus, in the spirit of going under the knife, here are three things Iām owning as we turn the clock to 2018ā¦
1) Making culture the enemy
I’ve learned many lessons as a state employee from persevering when treatedĀ like a number to managing challenging subordinates, but arguably none hasĀ gripped me so intensely as knowing your enemy in the face of conflict.
Growing up, like many, I learned Ephesians 6:12: “…we don’tĀ wrestle against flesh and blood, but againstĀ the rulers,Ā authorities…andĀ spiritual forces of evil”; however, while I understood thisĀ truth conceptually, I lacked awareness contextually. For instance, at workĀ whenever I felt belittled or neglected, I used toĀ justify resentment by redirectingĀ my disappointment fromĀ colleague to culture. Iād think to myself, āAs long as what I hate isnāt breathing, Iām good.ā
The problem was: myĀ offense wasn’t going anywhere. If anything, I had taken cynicism with respect to ‘person’ andĀ extrapolated it over ‘many persons’ all the while exchanging discouragement for a false comfort I could easily hide behind.
Yet, as I’ve nowĀ learned, when it comes to not makingĀ culture the enemy, we must be willing toĀ assign ourĀ offenses and align our defenses in the heat of battle. Far too often, we want to make sense of our surroundings; we want to feel secure about who is for us, who isn’t for us, who is pouring into us, who isnāt, etc.
However, ifĀ our filing system defaults culture to enemy whileĀ compartmentalizing thoseĀ we assume aren’t for us as products of thatĀ culture…are we notĀ recasting the sameĀ judgmentĀ we fear?
And yeah, I know it’s easy to appoint anger and bitterness onto what we think can’t be seen; however, I encourage you…
…if your idea of enemy is the deceived, not the deceiver, then not only are youĀ misappropriating identity, but you’re removing yourself from an opportunity to love and judge righteously.
Think of it this way: if you’re struggling to see the finger-pointing, never wrong colleagues as anything but enemies, try focusing on encouraging them (Matthew 5:44, Luke 6:27-36, Ephesians 4:32) and watch as God transforms how you see them.Ā That way youāre at least in position to shift the enemy from instigated to instigator.
2) Hiding behind proximity
As an introvert, I love my solitudeā¦that still calm in the middle of productivity and a dwindling āto doā list.
But lately Iāve been thinking: Why is privacy perceived as such a luxury when we were created for proximity (i.e. engaged connection with those around us…not just closeness in space)?
I meanā¦if youāre reading this, odds are youāre close1 to someone, right? From neighbors to co-workers to immediate family and friends, itās no question proximity is both prominent and prevalent. Why is it then if we were to describe our ideal escape, itād often involve seclusion or separation?
Is it because we think harmony and proximity are mutually exclusiveā¦that rest can only happen in a vacuum?
If so, I submit we get back to valuing those in our midst regardless if they treat us like strangers or outcasts.
āCause truth is: if how we engage people is conditioned on what we canāt control, itās going to compromise our conviction in acting on what we can.
That said, itās worth noting the false security in minimizing proximity.
Case and point: for years at my job I used to think to myself, āJust because so-and-so lives two cubicles down doesnāt mean Iām entitled to be closeā¦ā or āIāve tried talking with so-and-so, but after all these years, theyāve never tried to talking to me. Might as well as be strangers.ā
However, once I realized these thoughts were only de-salting my witness, I knew my approach had to change. Like my heart towards culture, I had to stopĀ compartmentalizing people to make sense of my surroundings. Somehow, somewayā¦I had to open myself back up so anyone and everyone could be a potential target for love, kindness, compassion, and encouragement.2
āCause like many, I can love on certain people wellā¦plugging into their lifeā¦even giving gifts (which for me, is far down the love language list), but when I consider how Jesus broached proximity, no one was outside his periphery to love or his reach to heal.
Thus, I think itās important we all examine ourselves and explore where good intentions may be linked to our own terms. Perhaps then we can find those secret places we may be hiding behind.
3) Marginalizing3Ā my bandwidth
Left unguarded, my mind can easily drift into personal narrative. How will whatās left untoldā¦unfold based on the good, bad, and ugly of yesterday?
Yet, as mentioned in prior posts, itās hard to invest external margin (i.e. loving one another) in the present when youāre overly vesting it in the past. Therefore, if weāre wanting to be more selfless in venturing our margin John 3:30 style, then clearly we must be willing to examine our perception of relationship before transferring it.
Granted, easier said than done; however, as long as weāre intentional in asking God to breathe width into our bandwidth (i.e. capacity/strength to love on purpose), whoās to say we canāt change?
And hear me: I get how tempting it can be to assume other peopleās perception of you is less than what it should; however, I also know if you cement your mind in thinking people wonāt believe the best, you will do the same as well. Why not then trust God to move, convict, and transform others the same way Heās moving, convicting, and transforming you?
If it helps, if you want to de-marginalize your bandwidth, go back to your narrativeā¦but this time, consider what you learn at 35 or 45 may be what someone else learns at 25 or 55. After all, who are we to judge when truth clicks for someone else? I meanā¦if we truly want to be heaven on earth, then we should want to root each other on regardless if our maturity curves line up (see Matthew 7:5).
Selah.
Footnotes
Literally and figuratively
A key distinction between world and ālike Jesusā
As 2017 comes to a close, Lys & I sit down and reflect on the year that wasā¦
When you think back on 2017, what immediately comes to mind?
CF: There are two answers to this question: The first and most obvious is Everly. Her arrival into the world, on Christmas Day no doubt, was by far the greatest moment of the year. The second and not as obvious is the word, āclosure’ (more on this in a moment) and the phrase ‘finish strong’. In short, where 2016 was a year of settling, 2017 was a year of transitioning…with many seasons ending on high notes and new ones emerging out from them.
LF: I think of ‘pregnant’ having spent 10.5 months in 2017 developing babies in the womb…preparing for transition in every major area of life from home to work to ministry…not to mention learning toĀ retrust and not borrow anxiety from what I hear around me given my story is my story and your story is your story.
What were some of the highlights/defining moments?
CF: Like 2016, 2017 felt like two years in one with our house hunt serving as a sort of ‘halftime‘. As mentioned, the big ‘Fry-light’ came on December 25 when Everly made her debut. Yet, going back further, Iād say my Restoring the Foundations healing week (April 17-19), the LEGACYouth white-water rafting trip, buying our first house (August 8), the Kingdom Youth Conference (October 13-14), and concluding our LEGACYouth tenure (December 3) all rank up there.
LF: For me…Christmas baby, wrapping up youth ministry and work at Ramsey Solutions, and prepping to pursue new goals as we transition from one baby to two.
How would you compare this year of marriage to the first three?
CF: No question, recent life changes have compelled us to be more sensitive and aware emotionally, intellectually, and spiritually; however, unlike the past few years, I feel like this year’s challenges were more joined and less amplified. In others, the highs still felt high, but the lows didn’t feel as low. I guess being parents has helped us grow not only as people, but as spouses.
LF: I think this year was more about choice than emotion. During our first year of marriage, we were standing face to face, holding hands…starring lovingly into each other’s eyes, but this year I feel like we were standing back to back with drawn swords ready to meet the challenges.
What lesson from 2017 are you eager to apply in 2018?
CF: Having gone through Restoring the Foundations healing this past spring, there’s so much I could say; however, if I had to pick one, I’d go with restoration requires not only the repair, but the rebuilding of broken pillars whether they be soul/spirit wounds, generational strongholds, word curses and/or deceptions. While transformation comes at the renewing of our minds (Romans 12:2), it’s only when we’re intentional in pursuing these pillars that we break off the past’s power over our lives, strengthen our present relationships, and invest into our family’s future.
LF: The lesson will be the continued application of trusting God to write my story and not assuming my story is what I’ve seen in other peoples’ lives. Also, the lesson I learned from carrying Everly: perpetual hope…as in my hope is in God and His character, not in my circumstances.
What do you hope youāll be saying at this time next year?
CF: “Merry Happy Christmas Birthday, Everly!”
LF: “WeĀ accomplished all we set out to do. We stepped out in faith and not only made it, but thrived doing it, exceeding every metric and loving those we encountered.”
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