When we talk about leaders doing ‘leader’ things, it makes sense those things remain above reproach. I think we can all agree there.
However, given leaders are people too, one must remember their mistakes are just as inevitable. Thus, how leaders handle adversity, setbacks, and errors in judgment is worth discussion.
For instance, in my ministerial role, there are times a protective heart can become overprotective if offense (real or perceived) compromises trust. Knowing my weakness, there are moments when I start to feel anxious and troubleshoot a problem before praying into it.
In these moments, I find the best way to realign and reset is humility.
Now, humility is one of my favorite topics, in part, since Jesus sets the ultimate example, not to mention, when I’m healthy, the trait isn’t difficult to employ. Growing up, I wasn’t always teachable, but once I started integrating humility into relational troubleshooting, maturing in meekness became more seamless, clicking into gear the more I realized I needed forgiveness on a daily basis.
In the case of this post’s inspiration, I overstepped a boundary in my attempt to establish one. Despite good intention, the execution was marred by impulse and entitlement. After processing my lapse in judgment, I realized…
To receive grace, one must first accept mercy.
The best way to do this is to yield our humanity to humility.
Applying these two steps, it wasn’t long before I went to my pastor and set up a meeting to apologize to those I offended. The process was exhausting yet liberating to the extent I allowed myself to be a grace filter. The more humility flowed through transparency, the more offense evolved into peace and understanding.
All that said, my point in sharing this story is:
1. Humility is a precious gift but also a powerful weapon and an exit strategy for those tempted to take reconciliation into their own hands. If pride (or any derivative) is like being locked out of your car, humility is the wire hanger that breaks the jam and gets you back to where you need to be.
2. There will be times when we think we’ve got it, only to find we’ve lost it. Thankfully, when we receive grace and apply humility, we become more concerned about what is right than who is wrong. By dying to our right to be right, we essentially find the right way to the right path. That’s the power of humility in action.
As for the month ahead, stay tuned as I plan to revisit my toxic workplace series and unveil some traits of healthy/non-toxic work cultures.
‘Til then, stay humble, my friends, and consider praying in the Bible verses below.
I’m sitting in a Wendy’s watching Jesus of Nazareth (1977) for the 24th straight spring. My car just down the street getting that Midas touch, not exactly how I envisioned my Saturday afternoon when the day started. However, I have a laptop. I’m submerged in holy content. I have what I need to preserve a meaningful tradition. Let the Holy Saturday illuminations begin…
As some of you know, each year, I pick an obscure part of the Resurrection narrative to dissect, some closer to the Cross than others. This year, I want to discuss the Zealot component, specifically the contrast between Simon and Judas who prior to Jesus’ condemnation, wrestle with their idea of Jesus’ Messiahship.
While not much is said directly regarding Simon, we can deduce a few truths about his upbringing:
He was saturated in extremist notions and conditioned by a pack hell-bent on retaliation and reciprocity,
He heard the teachings of Jesus and was inspired to lay down the cause of vengeance against the Romans.
He became a disciple after realizing change would come internally, not externally.
The Bible also notes Simon’s whereabouts (Matthew 10:4; Mark 3:18; Luke 6:15, Acts 1:13), proving he, like the other disciples not named Judas, was anointed and appointed to spread the gospel and lay down church foundation in the process. Essentially, the Romans Road in the midst of Roman oppression was more than a pathway for Simon but also a revelation of God’s Kingdom being encountered through repentance as opposed to force. While implied, Simon’s willingness to let go of the past as well as toxic relationships and attached paradigms, models the type of practical sacrifice we must sometimes make to advance the influence and ways of God.
As for Judas, we find a stronger stubbornness in releasing ambitions and presumptions. Blessed with a scholarly mind, the ‘wisdom’ of Judas was more based in rationale and divine proximity than faith and intent to surrender. Blinded by grandiose expectations and Satan alike, Judas seldom operated outside of agenda during His time with Jesus; hence, why Judas never repented when remorseful as unlike Simon, the lifeblood of Jesus’ message never sunk in. Granted, for Jesus’ mission to be realized, he needed to be condemned and crucified first, which couldn’t have happened without a mole, a son of perdition (John 17:12) as prophesied in Zechariah. A scapegoat setting up the sacrificial Lamb, one can only imagine what would have happened to Judas had he held out a little longer and received grace in Peter-esque fashion.
Either way, while Judas’ fate was sealed by his transgressions and refusal to repent, there’s a peace to derive from his part in Gospel history. For all have fallen short of the glory of God and have been blinded by the enemy within the context of sovereignty. Yet, even in the midst of high-level rebellion and disobedience, God’s purposes cannot and will not be thwarted. While Judas’ demise is a cautionary tale, we can humbly relate to his shortcomings, knowing there have been times in our own lives we have wanted God to manifest on our own terms. If any of you reading this have ever craved freedom in a way that made sense, remember the joy of the Cross set before you. Show compassion. Receive forgiveness, Carry on.
As for the rest of us, may we marvel at Christ’s exhibition of rightly aligned passion and change course in the direction of Jesus courtesy of Simon’s example. Before kingdoms change, the hearts of men must change (Isaiah 32:1-5) and in this era of chaos and uncertainty, let’s appreciate how the prophecies of old eclipsed by the Cross still have resounding relevance today.
In my last post, we discussed the biblical definition of growing up and laid out a generic pathway for reference. Today, I want to set another layer and explain some practical ways we can do this corporately in 2024.
No question, there is much in terms of chaos in our nation and world today. As my January fast reminded me, not only has this decade been culturally frustrating and concerning, but it has exposed the neutrality of many believers who are struggling to process the rapid decay around them. While I understand the tendency to want to look away, the truth is we must stand firm and strong together which cannot happen without awareness, intentionality, and as Steve Berger says, “compaction” (blending compassion and action).
How we do this from our respective offices around the globe? I’m so glad you asked! Without further ado, here are a few practical solutions we can take to mature in our vertical reliance in 2024…
Return to ancient pathways.
This first point may seem basic enough but I believe if we are to decrease appropriately as God increases in our midst, we must return to ancient pathways, specifically in honoring the name of God, the time we invest in His Word, and the Sabbath Day. As we progress in this era of media and technological saturation, one cannot combat the grey without acknowledging its existence, the grey being the small, sometimes subconscious ways society compels us to devalue our faith, spiritual identity, and God’s presence through copings and stimulations. Frankly, if we want to grow up individually and collectively in 2024, embracing holy fear is not an option. As the dark gets darker, so must we love what God loves and hate what He hates all the more. While some may label you as Pharisaical, dare to surrender the anxiety as one of the flesh. After all, the world needs to see absolutes be true to their name and for all who confess and profess the name of Jesus to be anchored, even as persecutions and prejudices elevate from third-world countries to just down the hallway.
If you’re reading this as an employed Christian, I encourage you to inspect any place where you’ve taken your “faith foot” off the gas pedal. As you seek the Lord, don’t hesitate to examine where you may be compartmentalizing your confidence, even character in your quest to model life and light before all men. From there, take inventory of the bushels, refill your internal salt cellars, and watch what God will do as you embrace surrender and thanksgiving in tandem.
Model grace and perspective.
As I’ve stepped into a healthier work environment this year, I’ve been compelled to learn new skills while sharpening older ones. Along the way, I’ve been reminded how powerful perspective can be when observing and interpreting our surroundings, heartbreaks, and challenges. For instance, in years past, I sometimes fell short looking for my settings to make sense, affirm an emotional conviction, and/or be the primary means to personal development and growth; however, as I now understand, these habits, when left to selfish devices, can lead to inflated expectations and disappointments. Having taken inventory of my discouragements last month, the light bulb ultimately activated: For many, their willpower and/or lust for affirmation is the center of whatever change they hope to initiate. In Christian circles, we sometimes see this by those who subscribe to ‘name it and claim it’ theology, prosperity Gospels, and warped Golden Rule principles.
Yet, when we examine the Gospel of John, we find a different reality:
Apart from Christ, we cannot mature as new creations or represent Him in our aim to change the world, one positive inspiration at a time.
Why? Because if God isn’t the focal point, the true epicenter of our lives, there’s no hope of us seeing ourselves and our world correctly. Put another way…
Just as God is love, so must He be our perspective, especially if we desire to walk in fullness between the grace we give and the grace we receive.
Applied to our work, to hit the mark of Christ, we must be willing to walk patiently and deliberately with people as they learn and grow in their roles. If expectations aren’t defined, don’t just define them but expand the tent pegs of grace as you help establish them. In any season, growing pains and audibles are inevitable. Rather than avoid them, steer into the sting and sow perspective in Spirit and Truth (John 4:24) as peace-making conduits of grace. For we are called, my friends, to build our careers upon life, not the other way around.
Lead as a servant.
In today’s marketplace, many want to lead by results and metrics. To make an impact, to leave a legacy, one must pioneer new pathways to achieve greater attention especially in more competitive landscapes, at least so we think; however, when we look at John 13:1-17, we find an alternative approach demonstrated by Jesus who humbles Himself, washes His disciples’ feet, and sets the ultimate example for servant leadership. Growing up, I used to think this chapter solely previewed the Cross and Great Commission to come. Yet, as a working adult, I now understand the present ramification as servant leadership, a corporate call where we wash our teammates’ feet (with or without the shoe removal 😉) and champion our God given authority as Kingdom ambassadors within our spheres of influence.
Now, to confirm, servant leadership is a broad term and encompasses a wide spectrum of potential actions. That said, the moves we make can be as practical as they are profound. Whenever an opportunity intersects your doubt, consider asking a teammate how you can better support them. If ‘hands on’ in the way to go, then go out of your way to tackle a task either of you can handle as the situation merits. And if you’re really stumped, simply read the room, engage with genuine curiosity, and pray for guidance and peace to illuminate your steps. Who knows? Before long, you may be sharing your testimony over coffee as the Gospel becomes alive during the conversation.
Bottom line: When you serve as a leader, you preserve faithful stewardship and your commitment to sowing trust with whom and with what you put your hands to.
Of course, these points are only a handful of options we can take to grow up in our workplaces in 2024. For those looking to take more leaps in the months ahead, what are some other aims we can consider as we live as Christ and awaken the Gospel through spiritual and vocation effort alike? Feel free to share your comments below.
Otherwise, stay tuned next time when we’ll explore how we can serve one another through our co-worker in Christ (1 Corinthians 3:9) calling! Catch you guys on the Fry…
I’m taking in a familiar scene, a road once trudged 1,934 times over 7 years, give or take a few. By all means, I should be feeling nauseous, frail like the cracks on the sidewalk below.
But not this day. Not on this quest back to the desert where once upon a time, I punched in a rare card. Oh, to be a youth pastor with a full-time governmental job on the side. Those were the days, the former, I miss fondly.
In the air is the smell of victory as I trek this iconic incline disguised as an inverted hourglass. An interview? With the State? No way you could have convinced me a year ago I would be in that situation. Then again, as they say, expect the unexpected and you’ll never be surprised or disappointed. Tell that to a desperate hunter living on a prayer wondering how the heck it came to this.
Indeed, to tell the tale of 2023, you must go back to the beginning, a point when red flags were yellow and the hope for a better year was still alive. A promotion to a new department at work. Check. A fresh slate post-Jubilee. Check. Hot off a fruitful Christmas NICU outreach. Check. Certainly, some anticipations were well founded.
Yet, despite those hopeful prospects, there were apprehensions as the new year rang, the biggest one being our final small Fry in the oven with no one aware except Lys’ parents. In a vacuum, there was excitement, a recognition of God’s restoration at work. Still, we knew despite my promotion at work, it wasn’t going to be enough to make ends meet based on a poorly reshuffled financial deck and a lack of quality benefits. TennCare, the system is helpful but doesn’t cover everything. Somehow, some way, God was going to have to do what only He could.
Freshly commissioned by my former team of three years, early expectations were high the year ahead could be both a collective step up. Unfortunately, the writing on the wall would start to show in light of questionable corporate decisions, enough to know what was now becoming clear: 2023 was going to be my last year at Foundation Group, shades of four years prior when God guided me out of TDOT. I didn’t know how the transition would occur. All I knew is like the ending scene from Mary Poppins, the weather vane within had completed turned. Slowly but surely, a piece of me was starting to fade.
With the kids in school to start the year (shout out to Greater Things), Lys and I had to pull out all the stops to make ends meet. We started with one freelancing side hustle (lost to AI in May) and a few ministerial endeavors on the board; however, they were not enough to offset the support cutoff that took place following Jubilee’s passing. For the first time in our married life, we had to find creative means from the bottom of the barrel to stitch paychecks together. This included eight BioLife Plasma appointments between December 8, 2022 and January 19, 2023, the latter of which prompted my donation retirement having almost passed out due to blood loss. Freak plasma accidents, they can be a bear in a [matter] of speaking. 😉
The following week, I started an eBay store to offload sports cards, memorabilia, and apparel I didn’t need. While gross sales were much higher than expected the first 4-5 months, the operation only served to connect weekly financial dots and did little to help us pull equity out of our home. On the verge of bankruptcy only months before Aili’s arrival, Lys and I had no choice but to pray and pray often for open doors. In our hearts, we knew provision would come. We just didn’t know how the details and timelines would shape out.
As winter gave way to spring, our family received a generous offer to visit Port Saint Joe, Florida for our first full family vacation. During our time away, Lys and I were able to celebrate our 10-year wedding anniversary while the kids enjoyed their inaugural beach debut.
In terms of broader stretches, the late March to early May time frame was notable for two occurrences:
1) On March 27, The Gate Church hosted my dad’s 50 Years of Ministry Celebration in what was truly a special night for our family.
2) From March 21 – May 9, Lys and I participated in a grief support group at Vanderbilt Children’s Hospital in what would become a defining sequence for the rest of the year. Despite the proximity to where Jubilee died, we felt at home with our new friends, some of whom we still keep in contact with. As only the second bereaved parent support group in Vanderbilt’s history, our cohort proved to be an enlightening experience for several nurses on staff. From what we understand, more support groups are expected to launch in 2024 for those who endured Jubilee journeys of their own.
Like April, June was a meaningful month, albeit for different reasons. In a top three memory of the year, Lys and I took a weekend away to Moscow, Tennessee, to participate in a While We’re Waiting Retreat for bereaved parents. Like the Vanderbilt support group, the event would feature a balanced blend of community, healing, and direct support, essentials we desperately needed and weren’t finding anywhere else at the time. The empowerment and activation from the weekend would not only result in more friends but a guest appearance on the While We’re Waiting podcast in October and eventual board approval to start the first middle Tennessee chapter for the 2024 calendar year.
Apart from support groups, the dominant storylines heading into July were Lyssah’s pregnancy (by far the smoothest of all five kids), leading more Zoom calls with the Circuit Riders, and the job hunt reaching a fever pitch. Among the 200 applications sent on Indeed and LinkedIn between July-October 2023, roughly 8-10 resulted in fruitful networking including a pipeline for Foundation Group that specialized in not-for-profits.
Of course, the ultimate Fry-light would occur Friday, July 28, the day on which Aili was born. Although her earthly entrance doesn’t offset the incompleteness Lys and I feel, the wonder of God’s faithfulness as evident through the moment struck a victorious nerve in the context of God’s sovereignty and our testimony unfolding. Literal beauty from ashes (Isaiah 61:3), Aili’s arrival was more than cathartic but a sweet reminder to praise God for the way He ministers encouragement and comfort to the brokenhearted. Like a gift that keeps on giving, Aili continues to warm our hearts through smiles and reflections of divine providence. Even in the wake of last year’s tragedy, the surrealness of her presence has, no question, bonded our family together in greater measure.
Fast-forward to November 7 and the job search finally concluded after five months of persistent effort. Honestly, I will never forget the call I received from Mercy Multiplied during which they confirmed an offer for me to become their Accounting Manager, instantly justifying God’s call from January and the many closed doors that preceded in the months following. To think my application came in one day before the position was pulled from online job boards blows my mind – just another example of how God is faithful to guide and provide especially in the clutch. Since then, I’ve been able to find footing in a healthier environment working for Nancy Alcorn and her Finance team. No doubt, the experience, highlighted by the Merry Mercy 40th Anniversary Celebration earlier this month, has been a breath of fresh air.
And so, as the sun sets on 2023, I bid it adieu and relish the opportunity to start afresh and anew. Occasionally, I think back to that day in January, the one BioLife missed the vein, and how it triggered a resonating desire for the look of life to change in every facet outside immediate family and friends; however, I also remember praying, ‘Lord, even if these changes don’t happen, even if I feel like I’m sinking at the end of the year, give me healthy wife/healthy baby and I will gladly take it‘. Safe to say that request accrued dividend and interest as Aili, and her older sibling trio continue to mature in stature with Lys making progress towards 2020 levels of health.
Still, even with the advances of late, the hurts linger. Moving on is hard; adjusting to life post-Juby (while we’re gettin’ there) is hard; learning your youngest son is auti..ahem…neurodivergent…is hard; employing financial wisdom is hard; not feeling seeded in crucial areas…you guessed it…is hard. Then again, life was never meant to be easy and I’m quickly reminded how we can do all things through Christ who strengthens us even when we feel alone, disappointed, unheard, misunderstood, even neglected. Hence, why Lys and I are not discouraged to the point of wavering despite 2023 going down as the roughest year since 2011. For as 2021 and 2022 taught us…
…clinging to hope at the end of your rope is not just a hell to pass through but a hotspot to discover God’s love amidst the endurance.
Thus, while 2023 felt like navigating a pothole-laden highway, we can give testament to God as a solid foundation amidst the voids. Despite the adversities, I give Him all the praise for how he’s helped me put the family on my back and carry them through streams of troubled water this year.
To new faces and friendly spaces, we thank you for being valued connections in life and as part of our support network. To those on the other side, we thank you as well for your part in making us stronger. Just as without suffering and chaos, there cannot be compassion and peace, so too we cannot grow stronger without deficits and prompts to overcome. Accordingly, we can be grateful for the situations that awaken us to draw closer to Jesus regardless of the specifics involved. Granted, we understand many of you reading this have sowed refreshment and have extended goodwill to many during the past few years. For that, we share our warmest regards and wish you nothing but God’s best this holiday season.
May you all be blessed and enriched with the grandeur of His highest,
~ Cameron (and Lyssah) Fry
Prayer Points (in no particular order)
Favor with Cameron’s new job at Mercy Multiplied
Favor with the launch of the While We’re Waiting Nashville small group
Ministerial direction (i.e. knowing where God wants to plant us in 2024)
Mentoring/networking opportunities (i.e. knowing who we’re to team with/invest relationally)
New work opportunities for Lyssah (remote or hybrid)
Family health/Milo’s occupational therapy
Progress with Cameron’s Jubilee Journey book and a jumpstart of the His Girl Fryday podcast
So last week, we laid some groundwork on spiritual gifts and vocations, examining our priesthood in a professional light. As for today, I want to apply some gridwork with respect to our influencing identity.
To do this, we need to accept a few core truths about God and how He’s created us:
We are all designers, developers, and/or managers¹ (grid #1).
The reason for this validates the existence of the Trinity (grid #2).
The reason for this confirms our receipt of ascension (i.e. apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor, teacher, elder, deacon) gifts.
Each ascension gift (Ephesians 4) has a corollary designer/developer/manager counterpart.
Let’s break this down further by matching Grid 1 to points 3-4…
Grid 1
Designer (God the Father)
Designer/Developer
Developer/Designer
Developer (God the Son)
Developer/Manager
Manager/Developer
Manager (God the Holy Spirit)
Combined with Ephesians 4…
Designer – __Apostle__
Designer/Developer – __Prophet__
Developer/Designer – __Evangelist__
Developer – __Teacher__
Developer/Manager – __Pastor__
Manager/Developer – __Elder__
Manager – __Deacon__
A few quick points/reminders before I continue…
The goal of this series is to help you discover your unique intelligence and giftings within your vocation.
These lists apply to everyone, not just the ‘spiritually elite’.
To simply comparisons, we are going to add ‘elders’ and ‘deacons’ to the ascension gift pastoral cluster so we can match 7 gifts with 7 functions.
While Grid 1 represents the three principle leadership styles, no question there are many more subcomponents worthy of discussion. Perhaps I’ll unpack some of them later on; for now, let’s focus on these filters and proceed.
Concerning the Trinity, the designer, developer, and manager roles imply core function, not sole function. While each member has a primary role (be it governing, stewarding or convicting), this doesn’t mean secondary modes of service are neglected.
Having said all that…let’s take our accountant friend from ‘part 1‘. While he may equip through an apostolic anointing particularly in his vocation, there may be times he imparts as a prophet and/or evangelist¹. Why? Because while the core of his apostolic function is to bring vision and direction to people², the purpose of his function is to call forth destiny.
As such, it’s important we make a critical distinction before digging deeper…
While your leadership profile may default to a particular ranking, your leadership isn’t contained to it.
Like many behavior assessments, one’s approach to giftings and function should not be fixed within a vacuum but should be fluid within an established rhythm. After all, God creates order but isn’t subjected to it.
For instance, as we’ll go through in ‘part 3’, you may possess an elder/deacon or deacon/pastor vocational profile but may find yourself in a prophetic moment during a counseling session. In this situation, you may feel uncomfortable operating outside your ‘gift wheelhouse’; however, ask yourself what’s more important: Being Spirit-led or strength-driven?
As Scripture confirms, whatever your strengths are, they should never be what leads you or what you rely on.
“The Lord is my strength and song, and he has become my salvation: he is my God, and I will prepare him a habitation; my father’s God, and I will exalt him.” ~ Exodus 15:2 (ESV)
“The Lord will give strength unto his people; the Lord will bless his people with peace.”Psalm 29:11 (ESV)
“The Spirit, not content to flit around on the surface, dives into the depths of God, and brings out what God planned all along. Whoever knows what you’re thinking and planning except you yourself? The same with God—except that he not only knows what he’s thinking, but he lets us in on it. God offers a full report on the gifts of life and salvation that he is giving us. We don’t have to rely on the world’s guesses and opinions. We didn’t learn this by reading books or going to school; we learned it from God, who taught us person-to-person through Jesus, and we’re passing it on to you in the same firsthand, personal way.” ~1 Corinthians 2:10-13 (MSG)
As the Psalmist declares, God gives strength for strength…because He is our strength. Accordingly, we can be certain what He provides whether gift, function or vocation follows a similar line. Like strength, the reason we don’t have to worry about work being our identity is because the Lord is our source of identity. From the beginning of time, we were called with a progression to profession, with an occupational heritage by which to bless people. Why not accept the fact God is not only in what He appoints but is what He appoints as well?
As you journey this week, remember you are part of a royal priesthood maturing towards a promised land. Even if you feel you’re working in a desert or wilderness, remember you can embrace strength and intimacy with God through weakness. You can take hold of His sustenance through the marketplace manna He provides. And you can press on as walls of territorialism dissolve into radical equality…all because you know a) You’re loved by God and b) The reason we’re diverse in function/co-equal in value is so we can participate in God’s goodness while uniquely showcasing His glory throughout the earth.
Selah.
Looking ahead to next time, I’ll finally debut the 7 vocational profiles (apostle, evangelist, prophet, pastor, teacher, elder, deacon). ‘Til then, you got this and we’re here for you rooting you on.
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