There is a quiet but intense pain that comes not from judgment, but from neglect. You confess, open up, step into the light…and for reasons unknown, the other side withdraws.
What does Scripture say about this scenario?
First, the Bible consistently honors confession. “Confess your sins [offenses, insecurities] to one another and pray for one another, that you may be healed” (James 5:16). Confession is not weakness; it is courageous obedience, an expression of virtue rooted in trust both in God and in the community of believers.
But what happens when that trust is not reciprocated?
While the Bible calls believers to bear one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2), it also prepares us for a sobering reality – not everyone will respond with grace or remain engaged in it. Even within communities of faith, people can fail to reflect Christ’s compassion. Some withdraw out of discomfort. Others stay distant, bypassing love in the name of self-preservation, passive-aggressive retaliation, or simply making a point.
Yet, Scripture gently redirects our expectations: “It is better to take refuge in the Lord than to trust in man” (Psalm 118:8). This is not a call to isolation – but recalibration. While human relationships are imperfect vessels, God alone is absolute and constant.
Consider this: Your confession was never ultimately for them but before God. As hurtful as silence can be, a widening of detachment does not invalidate your obedience, minimize your need for wisdom and encouragement, or erase your healing.
In fact, Jesus Himself experienced relational abandonment in moments of deepest vulnerability. In Gethsemane, His closest friends slept. At the cross, many fled. Some even mocked. Yet, He remained anchored in the Father’s will, not human consistency.
So, what do you do with the ache?
You grieve it honestly. You resist the urge to harden your heart. And you keep pursuing authentic community – because while some may fail you, others will reflect the grace you hoped for.
Put another way…
Being neglected after confession does not mean you chose the wrong path; it just means you chose the narrow one.
My charge to you, my friends, is simple: Keep going, pray for the ghosting orbiters who have strayed, and stay true to God’s path knowing you’re never alone from where it matters most.
I’m cruising at 31,000 feet, overlooking the spine of the Appalachians. Heaven knows I’m still stunned by this career page turn – relieved and excited as I may be.
Am I anxious? Sure. After all, this is only my second week at a new job, with many faces to meet and much to learn. At the same time, I’m reminded of why I’m in this situation – and, in four words, why any of us are here at all:
The joy set before.
For some of us, we read these words and instantly think of Hebrews 12:2: “Looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.”
Fair enough as apart from foreshadowing samples in Psalm 16 and Psalm 110, this is the only direct mention of the phrase in Scripture.
Still, we must be careful with context. For instance, as a younger Christian, I often misinterpreted this passage, thinking the cross – the fruit of Christ’s mission – was the joy set before Him; however, as I now understand, the joy set before Christ was exaltation with the Father in the presence of a redeemed people.
You see, the ultimate sacrifice – the necessity of reconciliation – is only half the story. The other half is the eternal invitation we have with God, in the presence of Jesus, who endured the cross as a prerequisite.
Accordingly, the joy set before us should not be limited to our sins being atoned for but should extend to thy Kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. Understandably, there is a temptation to base Easter joy primarily on the freedom we have in Christ because of His death and resurrection. Yet, if we are to grow into the likeness of Christ – if we desire to deepen our gratitude for that freedom – we must celebrate where it ultimately leads: the throne room where Jesus resides today and will forever.
What about the part where we “despise the shame” of the cross?
Again, referencing Hebrews 12, we find the answer. Christ did not detest Calvary but rather anything that threatened the joy of redemption – the public humiliation, disgrace, and intense suffering of crucifixion. In full submission to His mission, Jesus never faltered in obedience to the Father or in the intimacy that obedience required. In all He accomplished – in heart and in word – Jesus not only kept joy at the center of His hope but expressed love as the currency of every cost He counted.
Even as a child, Jesus knew where He was going. Unlike most journeys with a fixed endpoint, Christ’s destination was less static and more perpetual, saving those He loved and sanctifying them from His Father’s right hand. In essence, the joy set before Christ was His Father’s house: a dwelling from which He could save from an exalted place, draw near to the brokenhearted, and prepare a place for them.
Yes, Jesus anticipated completion (i.e., “It is finished”), but what He truly desired was to give people the opportunity to experience what He knew – to invite them into a place where pain and strife fade into glory.
My question to you, my friends, is simple: Is joy set before you? If not, what is? What is driving you, calling you, fueling your purpose?
Whatever your answers, let the cross be a prompt to recalibrate your perspective – your heart, and all the aims and burdens you carry. Do not let them drift. Instead, let them compel you to look to Jesus, not just as the founder of your faith, but as the restorer of your faith, who purifies your sin and shame, from where joy was, and still is, set before you.
My mind is racing as I behold a cherry blossom shower outside my office window. Heaven knows I will miss this visual as long as I have a career and a nameplate. With whom I’ve conversed with and to what I’ve learned within this space, I will always be grateful.
Still, the bell tolls for transition. There’s so much I wish I could say, so little time. But with wisdom in tow, often less is more. After all, this isn’t the same Cam who left his prior gig, who crashed out under the weight of burnout and bereavement grief. No, this is a new day fueled by fresh perspective and humble beginnings having aged well. With broadened scope, I proceed with gratitude, praising God for what He has done and how He has led.
Granted, this doesn’t mean I’m unruffled within the timing. After a decade in state government and four years at a private nonprofit accounting firm, I expected this season to last longer. Considering my vocational arc, an Accounting Manager opportunity in a ministry non-profit setting made sense. Yet, as I’ve sought the Lord, He has settled and focused my mind onto a critical concept – His use of the ‘lifeboat’ season.
What is a ‘lifeboat’ season? In short, it’s a relatively shorter stretch of time when God moves and matures us from and/or through chaos to sharpen our reliance. Like a bridge or connector between longer, more pronounced periods, a lifeboat season is more than a transient résumé stop but a recalibrating place where God purifies, rehabs, and in some cases, accelerates us to higher ground. If you’ve ever experienced a two-in-one type year with accelerant meeting the growth track, chances are you were in a lifeboat, a gifted opportunity to discover and recover.
In many ways, this is why I can smile when reflecting on my 28 months at Mercy Multiplied. Despite a decent amount of corporate transition during my tenure, the Lord proved faithful in connecting me to the right people at the right time. To the extent I endured, to that extent I sensed my contributions steadying the course during critical moments. The cross-departmental endeavors, the ability to improve systems, the capacity to learn from the past and on-the-go simultaneously, the privilege to mentor a younger associate, these are only a few of the perks I’ll miss moving forward.
To Keli Haymes and Hanna Noel, thank you for not only bringing me on board but ushing me into a foreign culture with grace while helping me discover my voice. To Patrick Bates and Kathryne Coonce, thank you for the quality guidance and tag-teaming in helping me finish my first year strong. To Melanie Wise, Erin Gentry, Rachel Bedenbaugh, Lauren Hobar, Stephanie Levesque, Jessica Jackson, Julie Bowsher, Canaan Lucas, Caronda Williams, Wendy Nichols, Sharon Manuel, Shantray Smith, Cindi Hagen, Melody Morris, Brittany Porter, thank you for the ways you’ve encouraged me over the years while entertaining my budget/accounting inquiries. Jessica, to you especially, thank you for the patient partnering and bridge-building of late. Working together within God’s ministry of reconciliation, who knew how much adventure we’d find! To Meaghan Briggs, watching your leadership evolution has been a highlight the past year. I wish you nothing but the best as you continue co-captaining the ship!
To Danae Dalbey, Hayley Freels, Adelein Nichols, Ana Holland, Mikaela Moore, Pachion Moore, Katelyn Sehl, Sarah Vaughn, Whitney Robinson, Whitney Thomas, Kristen Mahy, Dawne Shew, Loryann Sanchez, Shakayla Hall, the CWC/KTF support staff, current home staff, as well as all California home alum, I salute you and your hustle in getting things done with professional efficiency! Your effort and the brightness through which it shines, both past and present tense, is worthy of applause.
To the few, the proud, the men of Mercy, Jim Melton, DJ Tidwell, Jonathan Myrick, Daniel Reed, I can’t thank you enough for the laughs, the lunches, and the camaraderie behind the scenes. No question, it was very much needed. Here’s to not being strangers as we voyage into the great beyond.
To Ashton Nawas, holy smokes, I could not have excelled without your ‘safety net’ presence. What a joy it was to work with you and the Inflammo team these past few years! Same shout-out to Blankenship, especially Tommy Wooten for carrying us through some grueling audits! No question, I learned a great deal from you and your teams in the realm of financial storytelling.
Circling back to Jonathan, words only go so far in conveying how proud I am of who you are and the character you’ve modeled since you joined the Mercy team. You can take it to the bank, I will greatly miss the collaboration, the troubleshooting, and serving alongside you in the trenches. Your loyalty and steadfastness tandem is off the charts and has been an inspiration to many. You’re in good hands with Danielle and I look forward to hearing how God uses you and Katy in the years ahead!
And so, there you have it. With a full heart and misty eyes, I sign off on this assignment. I’ve fought the good fight, I’ve finished the race, and I’ve kept the faith. No regrets, no hard feelings. Just love and simply Jesus. Time to flip the page and let the Master Author pen a new chapter.
For the last time on this ground, I toast in triumph…
In Matthew 7:1–5, Jesus gives one of His most quoted—and arguably most misunderstood—teachings:
“Do not judge, or you too will be judged…Why do you look at the speck of sawdust in your brother’s eye and pay no attention to the plank in your own eye?”
Spoken during the Sermon on the Mount, Jesus describes the character of those who belong to the Kingdom of Heaven. His words are not a proscription against discernment but a warning against hypocrisy and self-righteous condemnation.
But how can we apply this to our everyday lives, our relationships, and even our jobs?
As always, let’s dive in.
Observationsand Applications:
1. “Do Not Judge” — What Jesus Is Not Saying
In today’s world, “Do not judge” is generally used to discourage behavior evaluation and sin identification. However, that interpretation doesn’t hold up in context, as a few verses later (Matthew 7:15), Jesus implores discernment, instructing his followers to “watch out for false prophets.” As we see throughout Scripture, particularly in Paul’s letters, believers are called to evaluate teaching, fruit, and conduct.
Thus, we can deduce that Jesus is not encouraging silent tongues in the face of injustice but rather confronting a posture of superiority, eager to point out faults in others while remaining blind to one’s own.
2. The Speck and the Log — A Deliberate Exaggeration
While some picture Jesus as matter-of-fact in sermons, this passage reveals an expression of humanity, specifically the use of humor and exaggeration to make certain truths vivid.
Consider the contrast:
A speck of sawdust in someone else’s eye.
A massive plank lodged in your own.
The image is absurd. Imagine someone trying to perform eye surgery while a two-by-four is sticking out of their face. Crazy, right? Well, maybe not so much given our tendency to minimize our own sin and magnify the faults of others,
Note the metaphor’s tie-in to unholy offense. Any time we hold a grudge or foster bitterness and resentment in our hearts, we invert this order. Either we expect the other side to yield first, or we assume the speck is on our side.
Yet, the comparison infers, neither option is correct; hence, His warning: “For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged.”
Essentially, Jesus is cautioning us to a familiar theme in Scripture: The measure we use becomes the measure applied to us. God opposes hypocrisy because it misrepresents His character and misappropriates humility. When we judge harshly, we assume a role that belongs to God. When we judge mercilessly, we forget how much mercy we ourselves have received.
3. “First, take the Log Out.”
Notice Jesus does not say, “Ignore the speck in your brother’s eye,” but charges us to “First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck.”
Why this direction? For starters, at the heart of love is mercy, and mercy, by nature, does not condemn but seeks to restore and transform through constructive insight.
Knowing this, we can confidently confront our sin by:
Approaching others gently.
Correcting without cruelty.
Speaking truth without pride.
Extending grace without reciprocity.
Only when humility meets repentance will our correction convey in an empowering and encouraging way.
4. A Diagnostic Question
Before addressing someone else’s failure, we must ask ourselves some clarifying questions:
Have I honestly examined my own heart?
Am I motivated by love or by irritation?
Do I desire restoration or vindication?
Have I invited God to expose my blind spots?
Taking this inventory, we align ourselves to an essential truth:
Judgment that flows from humility leads to healing; judgment that flows from pride leads to division.
Ultimately, Matthew 7:1–5 drives us back to the Gospel, where at the Cross, we discern two clear truths:
Our sin is serious enough to require sacrifice.
God’s grace is abundant enough to forgive it.
When we live at the foot of the cross, arrogance dissolves. We remember that we are recipients of mercy before we are dispensers of correction. The person who knows they have been forgiven does not wield judgment carelessly.
Final Thoughts & Prayer
Matthew 7:1–5 is not a call to oral silence but to moral integrity. As modeled during His ministry, Jesus invites us into a community marked by:
Self-awareness
Repentance
Mercy
Clear-eyed love
However, to fully abide in this series, we must repent of any place where we find safety in critiquing over confessing and/or analyzing another’s pride before confronting our own.
Bottom line: Before we reach for someone else’s speck, dare to kneel with your own log. Once immersed in that posture—low, honest, dependent—it’s only a matter of time until you begin to see clearly again.
Let’s pray…
“Heavenly Father. We commit this study, this day into your hands. We ask you seal your truth into our hearts. May it not vacate our ears or return void. Continue to teach us how to forgive, how to timely release our offenses. Refine this quality in our spirits so we can better illuminate the fullness of your love. We receive your grace afresh and anew with the aim to extend what you’ve blessed and equipped us with. Whether we’re poor in spiritor riding high in faith, reveal to us logs to extract so we can maturely handle the specks we encounter. In your holy, precious name, we declare victory in this area as we conform to your likeness. May it be so. May it be done. We love you, Lord. Amen.”
Two months into grief counseling, I’ve been thinking about certain deterrents, specifically those that rob our security in Christ.
Why is it so many take momentary solace in the Lord, yet overall, feel less assured within His sovereignty? Why are some content in their acceptance of Jesus, but not in their walk with Him?
Looking in the mirror, I’ve been compelled to take inventory, in part, to assist the new support I have on the ground. The fact I’m even in this position is a huge answer to prayer.
Still, the reality and discovery alike are uncomfortable; hence, why I’m on the hunt for words, wisdom, and answers. What makes one want the safety of God’s protection without the anchoring? What keeps a man sealed but at times, unhinged? How is it one can mentally grasp his identity in Christ but not rest in his position in Christ?
These inquiries are but a few I hope to address in this new ‘Project Management’ series.
Before we continue, let me define “project management” in this context. Because I can tell you straight up: I’m not talking about an application of knowledge and tools to project activities. Rather, I’m highlighting the human condition to project our insecurities when we’re dislodged from the truth, when we’re overwhelmed to the point what we’re doing to others is reciprocally perceived.
Sometimes, we project insecurity out of feeling misjudged and misunderstood. Other times, we project insecurity to obtain a false sense of disconnection. Ever wonder why we play the victim card when we’re hurt and offended? Usually, the reason involves a desire to cast off our pain to fight or flight from it. The problem when we project insecurity, be it a suspicion, self-doubt, a reassurance craving, or unbridled fear, is we misappropriate humility and, in turn, miss opportunities to deal with offenses at their root level. Understandably, an insecure mindset can be taxed when confronting pride on top of everything else; however, we must realize if our belief in the reality of Christ is chained to seeing Him consistently reflected in the places He’s called us to, we can’t say we’re fully relying on Him. It’s one thing to be desperate for Christ to be known; it’s another to want His nature extended for our benefit.
Thankfully, by God’s grace, we have His Spirit to draw us to misaligned places needing correction (2 Timothy 3:16-17; Hebrews 12:11). In many situations, this is enough to mitigate an insecurity before it matures into a weapon. Yet, for those who are suffering at a high level, wrestling with grief, perhaps not as aware due to a medical condition and/or neurodivergence, certain behaviors and thought patterns may be more suppressed. What about these cases?
My theory is simple, though with application complexity under the surface:
Insecurity is a divergent manifestation of underlying thoughts straying from any root where freedom can be found.
In essence, it is a projection away from our original design by way of comparison, manufactured deficit filling, really any vehicle driving us away from surrender and reliance. Often, we project out, not up, when we’re shelled by concerns and anxieties outside our control or initiation. The question is: How do we project our way to Jesus, when the streams we’re in take us another way? For those in healthy places, how do we nurture cultures where God’s heart is evident, His power prevalent?
If I’m truly following Jesus for the sake of emulating Him, I’m not only putting myself in position to abide in my security in Christ, but also giving those around me a steppingstone foundation to orient accordingly. Put another way, our security in Christ doesn’t stop at the assurance of salvation but strengthens as we freely abide from the burden of condemnation, accept the credit of Christ’s righteousness (Romans 4:24), and replace unholy beliefs with radical, transformative truths. Adhering to this pathway, we can discover a new confidence amidst the freedom that purifies the way we love and partner with people.
So, may it be with this series – that those in need of purified projection find traction and momentum, where they can live secured in their walk with Christ. Buckle up, my friends. It’s going to be a fun, albeit bumpy ride as we journey closer to the Son.
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