Autside Looking In: 3 Ways to Support Spectrum People at Work

I’m blessed to serve where I work in this season. As my employer‘s name suggests, the extension of opportunity and grace has proven effective in recent years, a corporate Godsend in the sense I’ve discovered what I can offer within a healthy environment. 

That said, I’m also blessed to have worked in places where support and psychological safety were absent. Granted, those shortages came during a period when people weren’t as woke on the subject of neurodiversity as they are today.

Still, given the uptick of autism awareness in recent years, I want to examine ways employers can assist employees who are on the spectrum or struggling beyond their emotional or mental capacity. Too often, businesses will take reactive approaches to painful situations instead of proactively collaborating in humility. For what is working and what isn’t, consider this breakdown an attempt from experience to bridge the divide.

Let’s dive in… 

  1. Make Space, Show Grace

As one who is high functioning autistic, I can attest to the profound challenges—and lost potential—that come from working in environments where neurodiversity is misunderstood or undervalued. According to the Word, our individual design is not separate from our corporate identity given we are diverse in function and co-equal in value (Romans 12:4–8; 1 Corinthians 12:12–27). If we want to see our organizations thrive, we must understand this extends beyond job responsibilities to the very ways we perceive and process information.

For example, in previous roles, I was occasionally criticized for requesting additional technology, explicit communication, and extra time to process information—needs that stem from how I best contribute. At the time, I was embarrassed in the face of pushback; however, in hindsight, I recognize how advocating for these supports is not a weakness, but a strength that benefits the masses. Embracing neurodiversity requires courage from both sides. Leaders and managers have the opportunity—and the responsibility—to create inclusive environments where neurodivergent team members can excel. In turn, spectrum workers can extend patience and understanding to those who may not immediately relate. By fostering mutual respect and open dialogue, organizations can unlock innovation, loyalty, and a deeper sense of belonging for all.

  1. Withhold Premature Character Judgments 

When we examine an autistic colleague, there are certain factors to consider. For starters, many on the spectrum have heightened awareness not only to sensory stimuli but also rejection, exclusion, or just being misunderstood. Conversely, they can display diminished or skewed responses to social cues and nonverbal forms of communication, such as body language, facial expressions, even social media tact. In certain instances, an acute reaction may result when an autistic worker struggles to find words, senses a lack of psychological safety, and/or discerns discrimination. To the allistic eye, an autistic co-worker may be considered immature, irrational, emotional, or even complicated; however, in reality and within our behavior assessment, the truth is often beneath the surface of perception.

Regardless of our role, we must be slow to judge, if at all. While some mannerisms can seem confusing, the best move in general is to merge authority and/or care with curiosity before delegating constructive criticism. Rather than rebuke an accommodation, seek to understand its necessity. Don’t chastise an essential need when it might contradict your desire for conformity. Instead, assess workplace practices that can be unique and specific to each team member. In doing this, you’ll enhance a sense of security within your organization and decrease the odds of false labeling, treatment imbalances, and premature character judgments. 

  1. Nurture Their Strengths

Whatever you make of the spectrum, one thing is for sure: It is significantly broader and more complex than we think. As new information emerges, more people are discovering their place on neurodivergent planes. For those like me who didn’t discover their autism until adulthood, this can be quite the wake-up call. Yet, when we consider the big picture, we can find peace knowing once a diagnosis is confirmed and accepted, one can better understand how the difference between allistic and autistic is not to be compartmentalized but utilized!

For instance, most agree that autistic people tend to exhibit unconventional ways of perceiving instruction and execution. Some take directives down to the letter; others allot for creative interpretation. While understanding the behaviors, patterns, and preferences of autistic workers may be challenging at times, we must remember there’s value in not only acknowledging strengths and accommodations but nurturing them! For those in leadership, know your profiles, validate special needs, and as needed, calibrate them to company policy while receive contributions openly without bias. Even though your supporting autistic colleague may talk differently and process more visually, you can still reel in their thoughts and fine-tune their priorities with precision. Be empowered, not discouraged in those moments.

Of course, in all this, taking the time to know the person you’re pouring into is key. On some days, you’ll find a ‘hands off’ approach is best; on other days, you’ll note a direct angle into constructive moments is more ideal. Regardless of the situation, bear in mind an autistic person benefits from stimuli conducive to their focus and security. Why not use your voice and support to be part of what they need to find safety and success in their role?

Now, I turn the podium over to you. What do you think about this topic? What other points would you add to this list? Do you have experience on either end of the spectrum? If so, I encourage you to share your thoughts. In the spirit of building one another up (Ephesians 4:11-16), Lys and I are here as always if you need us. 

God speed and as I always say in closing…

Cover graphic creds: Substack

Road to Healing: Why Even in Pain, There’s Still Jubilee

It’s been three years to the day since Juju’s death.

For better and worse, Lys and I haven’t been the same since that fateful day. While grief intensity has lessened, life still feels like a tightrope. One false step and we’re praying for a safety net, just trying to survive – like when Juju was alive only without the hope of tomorrow. If only I were better at patience, maybe this whole waiting thing would be easier.

As Juju proved during her NICU tenure, progression and regression aren’t always mutually exclusive. At times within her fragile body, one element was improving while another was degrading. Her recovery and, at times, lack thereof, was anything but a linear wave. Like life itself, her journey was a winding roller coaster with unexpected turns and unprecedented breakthroughs. Her butterfly tattoo on my heart, not a day goes by that I don’t think of her and consider the glory of what she constantly experiences.

Yet, though the tears have remained mostly at bay the past year, there’s still a temptation to anger. God, why didn’t you somehow, someway cap her suffering? If you knew she was going to barely make it past a year, why defer the inevitable?

In most cases, I can convert those ‘whys’ into ‘look what God did’ and carry on. Where I stumble is the next level down: God, why aren’t people more naturally geared towards the broken-hearted? Why does the silence sometimes increase when it needs to decrease? In the shadows, you were there after Juju’s death. What about those who may not even be able to find you at all? What about them?

These questions have been raised before, and they’ll be raised again. Until the answers come, I, along with the rest of us, must settle in Christ (1 Peter 5:10; Colossians 2:6-7). For those who have lost a child, we don’t have any other option. At day’s end, everyone has a call to embrace their suffering and ditch their baggage. No exceptions. I know for me, sometimes I get into trouble tolerating the baggage while trying to ditch the suffering in a quest to find meaning in pain; however, in times of reset, I catch myself in the striving and commit my ways to God whether I feel like it. It’s hard as heck, don’t get me wrong. I just know as low as I feel sometimes, I’m only hindering my perspective when I punt prayer and vertical reliance.

I love how Paul opens Colossians 3:1: Therefore if you have been raised with Christ, keep seeking the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God.”

For starters, the chapter unpacks our ‘new self’ identity as a garment we can wear regardless of the day. But even more promising, we’re reminded in the intro how we’ve been raised with Christ to a new life, sharing in His resurrection from the dead. In a weird way, this hits home even more so these days. Even when I feel dead on the inside, somehow, I know I’m that much closer to the type of life I crave. Among all the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God is also my daughter. Your son. His grandson. Her granddaughter. Their mother, their father, our friend, etc.

The way God’s lap is designed, there is always a comfort and rest to draw from, even if it’s simply His presence and nothing more.

The problem is we’re not often content with the safety of God’s nearness because we’re dissatisfied with the security of it. Our kid passed away, so we doubt if God is who says He is. If God is a God of love, then why didn’t His sovereignty meet my faith in the middle? If God has the capability, why didn’t His power take pity on a soul that could have done wonders for Him if given the opportunity?

While I’m not condoning this as the correct posture to take, admittingly, this is a popular contention bereaved parents wrestle through. We desire the improbable; we believe in the impossible. We just wish it could have looked a certain way. And that’s okay…assuming we regularly surrender our grief, anxiety, fear, and anger. As Juju reminds us, there’s beauty to be found in the ashes of our sorrow, especially when we reframe our perspective to see a life well fought as an altar pointing people to Jesus. Our lives may always sound like a sad song, but that doesn’t mean what other people hear is the same tenor.

Trust me, life has been brutal, dare I say, savage, this decade. Despite the positive turn in recent years, my debates with God are still on the regular.

Dear Lord, thank you for what you did during Juju’s life and gifting my family with this incredible light, this testimony unfolding, but surely you know what it’s like to grieve. You know what it’s like to be separated from your only begotten Son. If you’re stripping me of anything my life could cling to other than you, so be it. I don’t have to know how you’re exalted in those moments as long you’re exalted at all. And with a daughter dancing in your courts, I dare not lose sight of the new life I have in Christ, knowing that’s exactly what she has.

For all you readers and co-sufferers out there, ask yourself: Will I be too stubborn in my grief to don new garments of praise? To serve and think within new wineskins? Or am I too scared to endure because I don’t want God to let me down again? I know for me, I don’t have the margin, nor do I want to give that question room to manifest. Thus, I will keep looking up and pressing on one step at a time, with Juju’s rays forever on the horizon. The victory’s been won. Let’s choose to walk it in. God, show us the way…

Selah.

Master Plan: How to Discover God’s Will for Your Life

Rooted in the heart of every person there is a question:  What’s the purpose of my life? Perhaps you are reading this blog right now because you are searching for an answer to that question. Or maybe you are wondering if your life is some cosmic mistake. You are not alone. Many of us wrestle with our identity or place in this world at one point or another.  
 
If you follow Christ, or have ever considered following God, this search for purpose and meaning points us to Him – the divine creator that knows our purpose. But maybe you have looked to God or His word to discover your purpose and still feel lost.  
 
No matter how desperate we are to discover our purpose, if we are seeking our own will and not God’s we are destined to struggle. As we crave fulfillment and pine for intimacy and influence with those around us, are we inviting God into our brokenness, our needs, and our search for His will?

Or maybe you really want to discover God’s will for your life but don’t know how to find it. If so, I want to encourage you through a phrase you’ve likely heard before: Where there’s a will, there’s a way. 
 
In this context, I’m not talking about our free will; I’m talking about God’s will, His guide for our lives and a pathway for us to follow.  
 
Micah 6:8 (NIV) says: “…what does the Lord require of you? To act justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God.” 
 
To me, this verse offers profound peace. No matter what we’re going through, no matter the void we’re eager to fill, we can reference these three instructions and reset our inquiry. Read through this prayer and consider praying it for yourself: 
 
Lord, in this moment, I confess I need You more than anything else. Though I’m anxious to know the next step for my life, I ask first that Your Kingdom come, and that Your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Purify my heart to be more like Yours, to know the truth of who You are, so even when I’m lost or confused, I can rest knowing I’m loved and made in Your image.  I want your love and your purpose for me to be the lens through which I see myself and the world around me. 
 
Dallán Forgaill captures this in the words of the well-known hymn, ‘Be Thou My Vision’. Here are three verses from that old hymn: 

Be Thou my vision, O Lord of my heart; 

Naught be all else to me, save that Thou art; 

Thou my best thought, by day or by night; 

Waking or sleeping, Thy presence my light. 
 
Riches I heed not, nor man’s empty praise; 

Thou mine inheritance, now and always; 

Thou and Thou only, first in my heart; 

O King of glory, my treasure Thou art. 
 
O King of glory, my victory won; 

Rule and reign in me ’til Thy will be done; 

Heart of my own heart, whatever befall; 

Still be my vision, O Ruler of all. 

In the poem, Forgaill asks God to make Himself known. He does not ask for answers or next steps; simply Jesus. As much as we want to discern the will of God, we must first arrive at a point of complete surrender and total reliance.  
 
And we see this theme of surrender and reliance echo throughout scripture: 
 
“Yes, my soul, find rest in God; my hope comes from him. Truly he is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge. Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge.” ~ Psalm 62:5-8 (NIV) 
 
“Then Jesus said to his disciples, “Whoever wants to be my disciple must deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.” ~ Matthew 16:24 (NIV) 
 
“Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you.” ~ 1 Peter 5:7 (NIV) 
 
“Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.” ~ James 4:7 (NIV) 
 
In doing the things listed in these verses, we can commit our ways to God and abandon unhealthy entitlement, idolatry, lust, and pride. We can even release to God our longing to know His plan! 
 
In summary, if you want to know God’s will for your life, pursue the heart of God, and the plan will come. 
 
 “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.” ~ Matthew 6:33  
 
God will help you discover His next best step in His perfect timing. No matter what is happening in your life, when in doubt, simply “pour out” a simple prayer. Here’s one example: 
 
God, I’m too hurt or lost to move in this moment; however, in faith, I cast my fear and anxiety upon you. In this posture of trust, I anchor my hope in you, counting the journey as joy as I wait upon you. Until then, I will say ‘yes’ to your Word in showing justice, kindness, and humility to the world around me. Amen. 
 
Mercy Multiplied offers programs and resources to help people find freedom in Christ and discover the seeds of destiny God has planted in them. Click here for more information about the Keys to Freedom discipleship study. 

Real-Life Habits: A Practical Example to Transform Your Life

Written 11/26/24 for our latest MercyTalk podcast…

Back in April 2018, four months removed from a seven-year youth pastor assignment, I had a revelation that produced a habit I still practice to this day.  As a state employee working in a stale environment, I sensed my walk with the Lord was starting to wane. For so long, motivation and inspiration overflowed naturally courtesy of 50 students and an opportunity to mature leadership in a liturgical setting; however, once I released the calling, I realized how much of my identity had become baked into my influence. Without youth in my life, I felt lost. Apart from my family, there was little to no accountability to guide my relationship with Jesus. Needing a spark, I knew my internal compass needed a reset.

So, I decided I would not only have daily quiet times during each morning commute but record them on my iPhone. With my weekly commutes averaging out to 6.5 hours, I figured I might as well talk and pray with God as I battle the banes of Nashville traffic. The decision turned out to be a game-changer as not only did the practice settle my spirit each day before work but allowed me to hear the mix of truth and lies roaming within. On some days, conviction came by declaring God’s Word out into the open; on others, I found grace simply in coming to Jesus as I was. In either case, my quiet time commutes were my happy hours during which I took thoughts captive and replaced them with holy perspective.

Fast-forward to October 2022 and I’m a month removed from losing my daughter, Jubilee, who took her last breath in my lap after a 393-day fight with chronic lung disease. For weeks I had been stone cold, flooding the pavement with tears during my workouts. Yet, everywhere else, the frozen numbness of grief had overtaken me. That’s when I returned to the practice of recording my quiet times on drives to work. During Jubilee’s life, the habit had faded to back-burner status through all the hustle and bustle. While there were times before Juju’s death when I felt as if I was walking on water, I sensed the sinking heading into 2023. If there ever was a time to rekindle the rhythm, this was it.

Like five years prior, I found myself pressing the red record button in my Audio app more frequently. With vulnerability on blast, there was never an intention of sharing the files with anyone. I simply needed to feel a connection with God, to feel His presence and listening ear calming the choppy waters of my soul. Occasionally, I would stumble upon an ‘ah ha’ moment, an epiphany with content-creating potential; however, the end goal was always to make room for God to invade my space and to catch Him doing it so I wouldn’t forget.

Having reached 400 records as of 11/20/2024, I can confidently say this habit has proven effective in stabilizing my mind, emotions, and walk with God all in one swoop. I especially recommend the practice for those in seasons of chaos in which they want to declutter or ‘spring clean’ their heart to hear the Shepherd’s voice more clearly.

Cover photo creds: Medium

Let Your ‘In Christ’ Be at Work

Last December, I was taking inventory of my New Years goals and resolutions when the following revelation occurred to me: Why is it we’re more comfortable being for Christ than in Christ? Why does the thought of ‘in Christ’ intimidate us?  

For many of us, we trust God and His Word as irrefutable truth, our belief a banner we wave and a root system anchoring our thoughts and behaviors. Like many Christians, we can wrap our minds around Christ in us by way of salvation and sanctification. Yet, even though we know God is infinitely greater, even though we can generally comprehend the life He facilitates, we sometimes struggle to grasp our lives 24/7/365 in Him and accordingly struggle to scale the challenges in front of us.  

Often, we settle into rhythms, patterns, and mindsets where faith exists at their core. Still, I can’t help but wonder how they would change if we saw the ‘abiding in Christ’ potential in them. As to how we connect the dots, I submit we start by considering not only what does it mean to be ‘in Christ’ but how do we let our ‘in Christ’ be at work? 

First, we must discern what it means to be ‘in Christ’. To be in Christ means we’re unified with Him personally and corporately. In Galatians, Paul talks about our new ‘in Christ’ identity by way of putting our hope and faith in Him. For many, we hear the phrase during baptisms and communions when we identify with Christ in the likeness of His death and resurrection. Where the Cross has power, there we can abide in Christ as we walk in the newness of life (Romans 6:4-5), which defined one way, is resurrection applied to every thought, pattern, belief, decision, temptation, all facets and modes of life. 

While ‘newness of life’ can seem like a lofty phrase, one can always translate this to the surface through basic affirmations, saying ‘yes’ to ‘I’m loved by God’, ‘yes’ to the Cross and Jesus purchasing us at a price, ‘yes’ to leaving our sinful pasts behind, to ‘It is finished’, if you will. When we accept Jesus into our hearts, we embrace a new identity as children reconciled to God and our part of one body, the family of God, in which we abide from victory, not for it.  

In Christ we find deliverance and healing, victory and life, goodness and godliness. Colossians 3:3 says we have died and our lives are hidden with Christ, notable as this also reflects how we’re to store His Word after spiritually ingesting it.

Effectively, to be ‘in Christ’ means God sees the righteousness of His Son operating in and through us.  

But how do we exactly walk in this? For starters, we must position ourselves to be transformed by the renewing of our minds. While many recognize this opportunity as a gift of accepting Christ’s sacrifice as payment for our rap sheets, unfortunately, not all believers allow their minds to be renewed as spiritual walks fatigue and, in some cases, become compartmentalized. Sometimes, the hindrance is due to offenses that have matured to doubts, fears, bitterness, and resentments. When we tolerate these love-forsaken realities, our spiritual accounting becomes off-balance, where the cost of following Christ becomes almost equal to not following Him; hence, why many grow weary and stagnant. Over time, we become like vehicles wanting to hit the road yet are too scared about the fluids required to get there. Eventually, we stomach enough to reset and ramp onto new pathways, but with limited containers of health.  

This leads me to another critical point…

When we take stock of our walk every new year, we must understand ‘reset’ and ‘renew’ are not the same.

With a reset, you take your plate to God where grace is received through humility and rest is received by the surrendering of your will in the moment, but to be transformed by the renewing of your mind, one must be daily dying in the context of vertical intimacy. Take it from one who’s failed in this time and time again: It doesn’t make sense to reset our walks, and by proxy, our vocational and spiritual trajectories, if we don’t intend to renew our minds, respond to conviction, and invite God into our brokenness. 

Again, the obstacles are many but with them comes a challenge we must relish: In our aims to be equipped and effective, from knowledge base to spiritual growth, in our desire to experience greater wholeness, we must open ourselves up to be healed in our emotions. How we tend our broken hearts corporately cannot be swept under the carpet of mission, in the call we have to lay groundwork for holy repair. In the context of heaven meets earth, we may genuinely desire effectiveness; however, if we’re not acknowledging God in all our ways, if we’re not grasping our ‘loved-by-God, in-Christ identity’, our reach, the authenticity of our influence, will be capped.  

So, my hope for us this year is at the least two-fold:  

  1. That we release any inhibitions in fully surrendering our lives to God.  
  2. That we give God more room to invade our space in all areas of life. 

Not just at church, on Sundays, in our quiet times, but in our offices, the phone lines, conversations, yes, even the secret thoughts we have about each other. For if we’re not committed to being in-Christ, then our pride, anger, fear, self-centeredness will remain relevant, hinder our transformation, and prevent our minds from being renewed as God intended.  

In summary, to be ‘in Christ’ is more than being content under the shadow of His wings, more than being grateful on account of sovereignty and grace, even more than our redemption. To be ‘in Christ’ is to be so united to Jesus by faith, so in awe of the Cross and the ministry of reconciliation that our dependence detaches from anything that could make it conditional and the transformation by the renewal of our minds become an overflow of discovering God as He pursues us. 

May our ‘in Christ’ be at work, always and forever, even as we heal, even as we’re desperate, on and off the clock.  

Cover graphic creds: Ligonier